What's funny about a car accident involving three children, a widow, and a dog? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A man walks to his coathanger and shouts: "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!" his wife says not to because the Rapist 'Eggman' was out again. He says he will be careful. On his way to the store, he hears "They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggen-" but the man shouts "AND I'M THE WALRUS, SO SHUT UP AND GET OUTTA MY FACE OR I'LL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" the Eggman and the singer became friends and found two more from Liverpool who were excellent musicians. They formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band's breakup.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Roses are Red, Violets are blue Did you think I'd actually cry over you? I said I loved you You believed it was true Well guess what baby You just got played too! ??????

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A momma tomato and a baby tomato are walking down the street, and the baby tomato starts to fall behind. The mother turns to it and says "hurry up."

thumb_up thumb_down -14

why was sally bleeding? they never buy band-aids over her nubs.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Q: What did the duck say to the bartender? A: Nothing considering that ducks cannot speak

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A rabbi,a priest and minister didnt walk into a bar. Bars are for fun and fun is for not completely insane brainwashed people.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

what did the guy say before he went to kill the other guy? Im killing you

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything is black, I am blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

HAVE A GOOD DAY. DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

So a Jewish Family wakes into a German Pizzeria. They were very satisfied with the service and ended up tipping the waiter 20%

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the shrimp refuse to share? Because he was a little shellfish.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

I will create more jobs for americans

thumb_up thumb_down -16

what did the old man say to the older man? "hey".

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Roses are red Violets are blue I have schizophrenia And so do I..

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A Black guy and a Mexican are in a car. Who is driving? The black guy. Its his car.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Alchohol.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

1 + 1 = 11 Just kidding, it's 2 you moron.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do you call a man with a spade on his head? Doug

thumb_up thumb_down -16

my goldfish never writes me back when i send him letters

thumb_up thumb_down -16

I walks over to da shop de oother day and there was this guy and he was like... I bought some petrol. LOoooooooooL

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did old Mary fall off the cliff? There were no brakes on her wheelchair

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How many vikings does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Probably just one, though I'd imagine it hard to teach someone from the 9th century C.E. how to, let alone explain electricity.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Whats worst than getting bombed by the russians? The holocaust!

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops