What happens when you lose your fish? It dies.

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I'm Stephen Hawking, and I'm a PC. I can't walk or talk, and I'm a Stephen Hawkings

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When you have read this, you've already read it.

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Why was sally mopping the floor? Because she was a slave

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Why did the Asian drive his car into a tree? His contact fell out.

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Your face is hilarious.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he died. Why did the elephant fall out of the tree? Because he was to fat. Why did the snake fall out of the tree? I don't know everything, Bitch!

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A man comes home after a long days work. It is late at night and he gets in bed with his wife who is already asleep. Later that night he gets up for a glass of water and returns to the bed room to see that his wife doesn't appear to be breathing and calls 911. He then realizes that this isn't his house and he leaves.

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Q: What did the schizophrenic man say to his father? A: "Every time grandmother's urn shrieks, this pornography turns to black ink."

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What's worse than dropping your ice cream? Getting a virus that slowly deteriorates your body from the inside out.

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Q: what did the man with a broken jaw say? A: nnamkkiuuiriwojjkmgfmls!!!!

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Knock Knock. Come in.

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What is worse than a person eating cereal? A black person eating white children.

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If a tree falls down in the forest and no one is around to hear it, does God exist?

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Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. Where's my tractor?

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What time is it when a cow walks into your house? The time that your mother arives.

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Why did Jonny commit suicide? Airplanes dont have feet.

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You wanna see my secret freckle? NO! How about my butt? What!!!!!!!

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There was an american man on the way to work.

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What's red and smells like paint? Red paint.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I can't wait to shove my finge in you

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copy me and i will kill you

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roses are red violets are blue dinosaurs are extinct obama is black

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What's the difference between Michael Jackson and Neil Armstrong? Neil Armstrong was the first man to WALK on the MOON. And Michael Jackson was a child molester.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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