roses are red violet is blue sugar is sweet f*ck you im a moon

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why couldnt dylan make it to mike's birthday party? He was killed instantly in a car crash on the way there.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the hot blonde strip down? So she can take a shower

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What do you get when you cross a pig and a cactus? A godless abomination that violates every ethical standard known to man.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What do you call an anorexic with a yeast infection? Whatever their name is.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A white man, a black man, and a mexican are stranded on an island. They all died.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What did Helen Keller name her pet dog? dfhiwueghweigw

thumb_up thumb_down +5

in 2001 a man was working happily in his office cubicle and got an email from his boss saying that he had great news for him. filled with excitment he knew he was getting A big promotion and could finally afford that new toy his kid has always wanted. Feeling great the man walks up to the office window to enjoy the view he notices a very large commercial airliner flying straight towards his office.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

So three nazis walk into a B.A.R

thumb_up thumb_down +5

I've had Alzheimer's for as long as I can remember... So since yesterday.... CHAYOTE ASTRONAUT SPACE SAY WHAT?!?!?!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A man walked into his house to find that his wife was cheating on him with another man. He was furious, and killed himself

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A dog walks into a bar. It was a bar in Taiwan, so they killed it and ate it.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Q. How did the blind man savvier from walking of a cliff? A. He didn't he died.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How do you fit four gay men on a bar stool? You build an exceptionally large bar stool

thumb_up thumb_down +5

noah is a scrub jungle

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Do you love me? No.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's the difference between a smashed watermelon and a dead black person? One is a minor slip of the hands and the other is a fatal accident involving a human being.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Yo Mama is so white, people call her caucasian.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Three blondes walk into a bar...and have a nice evening, until one of them pulls out a gun and murders everyone at the bar, i think she was schizophrenic or something.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

The Awkward moment when the world doesn't end

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why couldn't Austin eat his noodles? He was a horse, and horses don't have hands, silly goose!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

roses are red violets are blue i have candy im about to rape you

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops