How do you stop a bus? Throw small children in front of it. Except that didn't work for the boy. He also lost his ice cream.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why isnt Gemma a Surfboarder? .. Because She was a Stillborn. Why isn't Kate a Ballerina? Because She's paralysed. Why isnt Tommy an Olympic High Jumper? Because He's a dwarf.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do you call a bird with no wings? Dead

thumb_up thumb_down -5

So Helen Keller walked into a bar... and then a chair.... and then a table..

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why did the little girl fall off the swings? Because she had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

once upon a time jess was happy this once upon a time was a very long time ago, BABADOOK !

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Vagina cream... end of story

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why is six afraid of seven? Because Osama bin Laden is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why couldn't the T-Rex give anyone a high five? Cuz he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What did the man say ti the other man? Hi

thumb_up thumb_down -5

what electronic vegetable sits in a chair? stephen hawking

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Yeah, Eliza, its me, its so strange, you are the only one I remember from highschool, I was worried you had forgotten about me, anyway, yeah type as if you where speaking to him, and dont worry, I know I could not keep a secret back then, and I told Nero, so and he promised me he would kindly break my fingers if I told anyone, besides I dont do that anymore trust me.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How do you wake up Lady GaGa? Poke her Face.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

I know a kid named Ruslonia. What type of name is that?

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Justin Bieber's mother.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did chad do when his friends came over? I'm not much of a fiction man personally.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

If life throws you melons, you might be dyslexic..

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's the difference between a sewer pipe and a French fry? A lot

thumb_up thumb_down -7

why did the man buy kool aid? because it was on sale and he was thirsty

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How did the man get arested? For doing something leagle.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why Didnt John Return any of his calls he was in a very serious car accident fell into a coma and will probablly will not wake up ever again

thumb_up thumb_down -7

2 nuns in the bath, One says "wears the soap" the other says "Over there, next to the shampoo"

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q: If I have 5 pencils, and you have 3 spoons, how many pancakes will stick to the ceiling? A: Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How do you stop the baby from touching the stove? Cut of its arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops