When life gives you melons. You're not dyslexic because you can probably tell the difference between a lemon and melon because they look so different.

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Did you hear about the guy that lost the whole left side of his body? Well, he's all right.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Black people are black They are inferior

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So a man and a woman are siting at the same park table Woman: sir are you touching my leg erotically Man: No mam for you see I am a parapaligec

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How do you get 100 Africans in a phone box? Throw a can of beans in there.

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84.52% of users disapprove of your post, plus or minus 3%.

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What's the time when black men take over? Poor past never.

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How do you keep a black man inside? Shoot his leg.

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A man walks into a bar. He has a serious drinking problem and is destroying his life.

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What is the color of your spleen? I dont know i'm not a doctor

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It is theoretically impossible to read another's inner thought process, but it was probably due to the electric stimulation from the brain to give the chicken's muscles the ability to move.

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What did one cat say to another? Cats cant talk

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I'm a fork. Fork you!!

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what is the germans word for fat dick what is very fat hairy dick

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what is red, black, and blue all over? A horribly painted room.

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What did the lady with Alzheimer's do yesterday She can't remember

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was a green man.

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If life gives you lemons, keep them because hey, free lemons

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What do you call a man with multiple sexual partners? Well, first you strongly urge him to get tested for any contagious and potentially dangerous STD's that could have been transmitted from one partner's genitalia to another person's genitalia which could have very well been he himself. They could be life threatening. Oh, and call him by his first name.

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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Why did the chicken cross the street? Because it followed the trail of bird feed strewn across it.

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what kind of road kill is green and smells like cookies? girl scouts

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Why did Suzie fall of the swing? Because she had no arms. Why did she fall of the second time? I pushed her.

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What is a five letter word that sounds just like trucks? Vroom

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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