you lose.

What's black and white and has difficulty turning corners? A nun with a javelin stuck through the neck.

Why was the dyslexic cowboy crying when he came into school that day? He had chronic diarrhea.

Q: Why did the Japanese man fall off the cliff? A: He was pushed

Who swept the woman off her feet? A kidnapper

What's green , has 4 legs and if it fell out of tree on you , would hurt you ? A Pool table

What's the difference between liberals and communists? Nothing.

Thomas Hobbes had a happy life. Actually he didnt, he was born prematurely causing his mother to die. Then his dad left him at an early age to the care of an abusive older brother because he was an alcohollic. He did inspire many political beliefs though

Why did the male propagate the female? Because he was drugged. Slyly, this foxy female had slipped the male the date rape drug and a dangerous amount of viagra. During intercourse, the male ripped a gaping hole in the female's stomach and killed her. He woke up confused inside a dead stinking corpse.

What do an octopus and a cat have in common? They are both multicellular organisms that are living creatures, and therefore are both sentient and can perform simple tasks and make simple decisions.

A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He can still hear his friends mocking him. He cuts his ears off with an industrial meat slicer. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see or hear.

why can't helen keller drive? Because she is deaf and blind.

Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

What do you say to a friend named Alex? The Game

There's a skunk and a lawyer standing on the side of the road, what's the difference? There are tire marks infront of the skunk.

Why did the girl buy the watermelon? To eat it.

I'm a lion hear my threat **** you ***** and then go **** yourself. if your scared and you know it and you really want to show it crap your pants.

What killed the dinosaurs? THE ROCKET POWERED FIST!!!

A man walks into a bar. Except its a metal bar, and he fractures his skull on it. He died in the hospital a few hours later

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

I may be ugly, but I'm also dumb.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue Violets are not blue They are Violet

why do people play xbox 360's? because there poor people who cant afford a ps3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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