What is blue and smells like blue paint? Blue paint.

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when i go to a nude beach people think im looking for lost jewelery and treasure

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Why was the blonde staring at the orange juice container? Because she was proud of her work as Chief Marketing Director of Tropicana.

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Your wife died during the delivery.

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Your mother is so fat that she once ate an entire peach cobbler in one sitting and chastised herself yet again for her lack of self-control over her eating habits and her need to fill the holes in her self esteem with the short-lived gratification she gains from eating too much of the foods she finds tasty.

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Two Blondes walk into a bar. They each enjoy a refreshing drink before heading home to greet their family

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Whats worse then getting hit by a truck? Getting hit by a turkey!

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a Polar bear in an Igloo.

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Why was Sally crying? Because she had a frog stapled to her face.

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Two muffins are put in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says, "is it just me or is it getting hot in here?". The other muffin says,"HOLY CRAP!!!!! A TALKING MUFFIN!!!!".

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why did the chicken cross the street? he couldn't, he lives in a rural area on a farm where there are no streets

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A farmer was robbed and complained to the sheriff's department that he suspected it was a black man behind the crime. "How do you know this for sure?" The sheriff asked him. He replied, "I chased him into the night, it was dark and I couldn't see him"

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whats purple and brown lucozade sport

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What do you call a cat at the bottom of the ocean? A cat.

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Hello? Hi. Who is this? Yo mom. Your not my mom. Im the Irish man that did your mom.

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What did the red cat say to his owner? Nothing.

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Q: How do you stop a skunk from smelling? A: Lethally inject it.

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Why was the Asian guy dumped by his hot girlfriend? Well you know what they say about Asian guys.... They are too dedicated to their schoolwork.

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why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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Other Guy: What are you looking at? Me: You.

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Child: Hey mom can i go to the store with you? Mom: no son, i'm not really going to the store. I'm cheating on your father.

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The king asked the jester why was he not telling jokes. He wasn't because he's a jester and therefore is obligated to be funny.

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No, you think faster smarter and harder than everyone I know, you change and adapt faster for each day, sometimes I just think one has to stop asking oneself what makes one happy, and simply choose to be happy.

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What you reading? reading?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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