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What's red and curly and goes 100km an hour? Palfi in a blender

Two dogs are sitting by a fire hydrant. One turns to the other and says absolutely nothing because dogs can't speak.

what happend to the kid standing on a railway, he got hit by a train

What was the joke about that woman with altsimers again? Ironically I forgot.

What's the only thing a Black Hole can't absorb? Nothing. It absorbs everything, even light.

Man: get back in the kitchen! Women: no Man: ok

Why is lewis rank gay Coz he is

so three men walk into a bar and one is a priest.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poems, wanna f***.

Your friend is so gay that he isn't attracted to hot women

What did the doctor say to the patient? You have cancer.

A retarded man speaks jibberish, because he is retarded

What worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. What worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust What worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings

A black man walks into a Ku Klux Klan meeting.

John has 32 candy bars, he eats 28..what does he have now? Diabetes.

What did the Mexican guy get for christmas? Deported

I AM DEAD, FUCKING, SERIOUS! NOW GET OVER HERE MOMMY I WANT TO... ...Thats pretty disgusting, I was born a man, maybe an infant man, but a man regardless. So how about you stop showcasing me to people here and we just take off? I mean I am dead tired and sleepy, I would say good night, but its day here now so yeah.

What happened to the famous musician when he overdosed? He overdosed.

Which came first, the chicken or the egg? According to the theory of evolution, chickens are descendent's of dinosaurs, meaning that a dinosaur laid an egg, eventually creating a chicken thus meaning that the egg came first.

What's worse then breaking your xbox? Going on a 24 kill streak and having itchy balls.

I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis

There would not be any me in we, you would have to hijack a media station, you would instantly be branded terrorists, and even if you where not, do you believe that you could have used the media in order to spread individuality, or would you simply have sought to control the masses like the rest? I am not saying that television is wrong, I am saying that as long as there are not enough people willing to think for themselves, and remain loyal to us and themselves, something which we failed at when we where at our greatest peak, then we are all media zombies eventually, and I do not mind, complacency is better than a constant struggle for survival.

What is pink, female and has two dicks? A mother with two sons, both called Richard.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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