Why can't Demetrius swim? Because he has a genetic disorder where he is paralyzed from the waste down, so he is therefore incapable of propelling himself through the water

How do you kill a blonde? Cut off the bloodflow to their vital organs.

whos gay rusty kohlen hit him up on facebook!

Yo momma so fat,she went on a diet and now exersizes regularly

Why did the chicken cross the road? chickens are very unintelligent, and often walk around aimlessly with no purpose.

Knock knock Who's there? To To who? No, Sir, it is "to whom"

Haikus are easy But they often dont make sense flying flamingos

I spilled spot remover on my dog. Now he's wet.

Rabid squirrels attacked Blake's face as winged pickles perched on Phoebe's hair.

What do you call a polar bear in the desert? Bobby Marksson.

What happened when the prisoner dropped the soap? He picked it up.

If she is old enough to bleed, she probably uses tampons.

What did the single guy do on Valentine's Day? Celebrate his birthday since he was born on the same day.

What do you call the fear of anteaters? Stupid.

Why did the police officer pull over the black person? He made a traffic infraction.

your mommas so fat i like fat cows is she home?

Black people being friendly.

A psychotic man walks into a pharmacy He buys his weekly medication to control his condition.

I don't want to share my name yet if that is okay, I mean I have not seen you, but you have seen me just saying. Tell me how old you are first, I am 26, or 27, being more or less an orphan since birth details like that kinda lose themselves. And no, its not Eliza, I will wait for you here if you do not mind, there are still people that have thought I am Nero all this while, that`s what worries me, I doubt I can convince them I am chatting with myself this time around.

What is a life without options.... an optionless life

Whats red and bad for your teeth? A brick Courtesy of: http://samsjokeoftheweek.moonfruit.com/

A horse walks into a bar, it is then frightened and bucks a man in the chest. Animal control and an ambulance are promptly called. The horse is then taken to a stable, while the man is taken to the hospital where he later made a full recovery.

a horse walkes into a bar... never mind that's just Sarah Jessica Parker

After visiting the dentist, Ke$ha had sixteen cavities because brushing your teeth with bottles of jack causes plaque to build up.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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