how do you spend all your money you go buy stuff

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Q: What's the longest word in the dictionary? A: According to the Oxford English Dictionary (second edition), it is "Pseudopseudohypoparathyroidism."

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What do you call a Chelsea fan on the moon? You don't call him anything... You call for help.

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Curiosity killed the cat! No, the tire of a vehicle did.

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What' do you call a fart in a box? Your mom's puzsy

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Why did Sally drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus.

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What do you call a deaf, blind socialist? Helen Keller.

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John Stamos.

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Why did the kid with no legs fall down the stairs? Because his dad pushed him...

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What do you call it when Justin Bieber has sex with a woman? Intercourse

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a woman came back from a long vacation, one of her male employes noticed that her breast were much larger, "wow, did you get a boob job?" he asked. she replied "no i have breast cancer"

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What's worse than a dead baby? The corpse is chopped into little pieces And is put in a blender. Worse than that? An alive baby stuffed into a blender. Worse than that? Hellen Keller put into a blender. Worse than that? The holocaust.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

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Why did the boy take the train to school? Because he lived quite far away.

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Why is it pointless to brutally kill and dismember a Japanese man? You'd be satisfying his sexual fetish.

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How do you kill a blonde? Shoot her repeatedly in the face and then slit her throat.

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What's the worst part about censorship? **** *** **** **** *** **** *** ********.

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A man walks into work and massacres 20 due to a mental illness.

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Is it possible to mix an answer to a question with another? No. Aids are perfect for fear training.

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DESERT

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Adam ci ?mierdz?cy kutas mi sie ya mam

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Chuck Norris played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and suffered from a self-inflicted gunshot wound in his head, he is being treated by medical professionals

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What happened when the white man saw a black man running with a purse? He called the police. The police proceeded to chase the black man down tackling him into a dumpster, causing permanent spinal damage. Upon investigation into the situation, the black man was deaf and he was bringing the purse, which contained an epi-pen, to his dying wife a block away. The police officers involved were fired and sued by the family, ruining their lives. Months later they both committed suicide.

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So like i was like 3 and I was like stupid or something I was only three, come on! three

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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