What's green and red and goes a hundred miles an hour? A frog in a blender.

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How do you count all the jews in a village? The United States Census Bureau usually has reliable data so I would start there

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When a blonde entered a bar, she ordered a something that was a double-entendre. The bartender understood what she was trying to say, gave her her order whatever alcohol she happened to consume, and the blonde woman could not have been more courteous.

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Whats worse then a hundred dead babies? One trying to eat its way out.

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What is brown and sticky? A stick.

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whats yellow and cant swim? a bulldozer

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It's like they always say, you get what you pay for. Unless your a woman, then you get what other men pay for.

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What did Spiderman do when he saw a crime taking place? He stopped it

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Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Seeing your mom dance

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why did matt daly shit his pants? he had downs

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What's red and invisible? We don't know that it's red.

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What did the toilet say when I pooped in it Nothing I just crapped in it

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nena. nerna. neener. neezie. nena.

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Why did the book disappear?

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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Why didn't the disabled kid cross the road? He didn't make it.

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What's white and capable of flash photography? A pony, I lied about the photography.

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What rhymes with Hitler? Walt Disney.

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Whats the different betweene a drugdealer and a cop? I dont know but i think they dont have the same wife.

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You've heard of take your child to work day, but I bet you haven't heard of 9/11- take your plane to work day

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Doctor, I've caught a cold. Take a Halls.

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No, luke. I am your father. damnit

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Roses are red... Violets are blue... Unless your colour blind.

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the WNBA

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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