How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how hard you throw them!!!

There once was a man from Peru. He dreamt he was eating his shoe. He woke with a fright, In the middle of the night, To find a man had murdered his wife and children.

What's brown and sticky? Fecal matter.

I what's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? I don't have 10 watermelons in my basement.

A man walks into a bar Then another man shoots him in the head because he has anger issues.

Why did the chicken stop in the middle of the road? To get to the other side.

What does a gay horse eat? HEEEEEEYYYYYY!

Q: what do you call a bunch of dead accountants? A: the holacost.

A girl gets raped -teagan d

What's the best Medieval job? A Jester because you get to play with balls all day.

How do you take a Mexican's money? You can't because they have none.

A straight black man walks into a gay bar.

Hey I just met you, and this seems crazy. I have Alzheimers... Hey i just met you.

how did the tree fall on the woman? it didnt, trees dont grow in kitchens

Why did Bob Marley Shoot the Sheriff? Because he was black.

Whats the difference between a corvette and a pile of dead babies? One is a specific type of sports car, and the other is a sad destruction of many young lives

Obama: And then I said there would be a change. (hahahahahaha)

Ya know what's sad? You can only submit one dislike on this website.

Why did the boy like watching NASCAR? He didnt because he was a fish and a secret Soviet spy

Why did the chicken lay an egg? Because she got knocked up.

So, a guy sees a guy, and asks that guy if he's seen a guy who knew this guy who saw this guy who killed this guy, who knew a guy who is Barack Obama's best friend. Oh wait, Barack Obama doesn't have any friends.

Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

What did the Priest say to the Rabbi? Nothing. The Priest was mute and the Rabbi was deaf.

What's the difference between a dead cat and a dead woman? It is much more unlikely that you would have sex with a dead cat.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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