Silly Sally Dillydallied then lost her job to outsourcing.

what is the vent wound on the ladies that can never heal???

Why couldn't Helen Keller see or hear? She was blind and deaf.

whats at the end of the rainbow? Purple

A hipster gets summoned for jury duty. The case is solved promptly and everyone goes home happy.

Roses are red, violets are blue ive got a gun so get in the van!

A man walks into a car. And drive's off.

learn the ropes?

"How come dinosaurs don't talk?" " I don't know. Why?" " Because they're dead."

What is 0+0? 0, I am not dumb

A man walks into a bar. He asked the bartender if he accepts $100 bills. The bartender says "no".

How much cocaine did Charlie Sheen take? Enough to kill Two and a Half Men.

Why did I have sex with your mom? Because she was a beautiful individual with a fine taste in the classical arts. She also offered me a ride to her place for a delicious 3 course meal. Afterwards our romance blossomed and we decided to have sexual intercourse to show our mutual appreciation for each other.

Why was the man afraid of the pack of wolves? The man was blind and heard his stomach growling even though he had just eaten two buckets of KFC.

Why is an orange, orange. Because you can't clean a window with a spade.

What is a panda bear? A bear with black and white fur.

Why was there two girls at the movie? They wanted to see the movie together.

Why did the man climb the mountain? Because he lacked excitement in his life.

what is worst than finding a worm in your apple? finding half a worm in your apple

Oh, I must be hearing things.

Knock Knock! Oh god Johnny, someones at the door! Hide the heroin and bail man, BAIL!!!

Why was the little girl blowing bubbles in the swimming pool? Because she was drowning

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple Finding multiple worms in your apple

Why did the chicken cross the road? I dream of a day when chickens won't be questioned about their actions

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...