how many babies does it take to screw in a light bulb? there are no babies they are all dead in my garage

thumb_up thumb_down +18

How can you confirm that Saturday comes after friday, and that Sunday comes after Saturday? consult Rebecca Black.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A man walks into a bar and says "hey bartender wanna help me out!" The bartender says "no."

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why? Whats wrong?

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Meh, I dont want it anymore! You can have it.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

what did the guy tell the other guy? you're gay

thumb_up thumb_down +16

how now brown cow. WTF.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Shit!

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was taken to a factory where it was butchered, processed and eventually fed to America.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What do you call a pen sitting on a counter? A righting utensil not being currently used.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

a blonde, a brunette and a red head are robbing a bank, they hear the police coming, so they try to find a place to hide. The red head hides in cat cage, the brunette hides in dog cage and the blonde hides in potatoe sack. When the police come the brunetter says "Woof, Woof!" the red head says "MEOW! MEOW!" and the blonde says "P-O-T-A-T-O-E!"

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Roses are red violets are blue sugar is sweet and so are you, but the rose are wilted the violets are dead the sugar is lumpy and so is your head.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

How did the black man get to work this morning? He didn't. He had been struggling with depression and finally this morning, he committed suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What did the prostitute get after sex? Syphilis... she got syphilis

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Kelly Clarkson

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why do jews have long noses? Because they received the genetic alleles from their parents that cause the nose to grow longer.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

How can you tell if your goldfish is male or female? Put some fishfood in the bowl, if he swims to the food it's a male, if she swims to the food it's a female.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

69

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What do you cal it when a black person gets married to a white person inner racial marriage

thumb_up thumb_down +16

why hppened when the little boy failed his math test? He cut off his penis, shaved his head and hung himself

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why is 6 afraid of 7? 7 has been charged on 3 accounts of 2nd degrees murder and 6 fears for his life.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

why was little johns' stomach in discomfort? because his mom accidently gave him mercury for breakfast

thumb_up thumb_down +16

feces

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops