roses are red violets are blue shut the fuck up or ill fuck you

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Q: How many light bulbs does it take to change a blonde? A: One, if she tries to swallow it.

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Can you guess the following words? Boo*s s*x *orn g*y cu*t b*tch Answers: Books, six, horn, guy, cult, batch.

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22

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A stop sign walks into a bar. Looks like somebody invented walking stop signs.

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whats the diffrence between love and faling in love when u love some one your not falling

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knock knock whos there !!!!!.....WE.....ARE.......SPARTANSSSS.....!!!!!!

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whats white and lives in a tree a fridge

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Person 1: What did the woman say when - Person 2: I know! It doesnt matter, shes a woman

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Man goes fishing.... Catches Fish.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? God. God Who? ::Apocalypse follows::

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Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact? Some men are blind.

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Two muffins are baking in an oven. The muffins do not talk or move, because they not living.

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Why couldn't Jim pogo-stick? He didn't have one.

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DAMMIT MY IPHONE IS IN REPAIR AND I CANT GET THE APP!!!!!!!

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Knock Knock Who's there? re-posession officers

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Two guys walk into a bar; A Mexican and a Canadian. The Mexican guy says "Bartender, give me a 2 shots of Tequila, por favor". The Canadian guy says "Bartender, give me a shot of Club and a Molson, eh". They continue to drink until neither can feel the crippling pain of their mundane lives - then they each leave the bar, walk home and sleep alone.

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How do you get a clown off a swing? You hit him with an axe How can you release your anger at somebody? Kill them How do you stop a bus? Throw small children at it

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A man walks into a bar. The ceiling was ringed with dozens of TV’s, much like your average sports bar. Unlike your average sports bar however, the TV’s were not featuring athletic competition. That is unless you consider vigorous and explicit gay sex between men hung like Tijuana mules to be a sport.

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Why were Jews discriminated against for thousands of years? They weren't supposed to. Jews are people just like you and me. And for every ignorant person out there that hates Jews, you better watch your back because God is watching you.

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A Chinese man walks into a bar. With his thick accent, he finds it difficult to order drinks.

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How do you make a girl wet? Throw her in the pool

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

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"I have some good news and some bad news, which do you want to hear first?" The good news. "There is no bad news." Then what's the bad news? "There is no bad news.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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