whats green and lives in the water

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What is small, cries a lot, and moves at high speeds? A baby stapled to a car.

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What's worse than aids? Being a virgin.

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SPILL THE BEAAAANNSSSS

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Big feet on a man means he has, Nothing, a man's foot size has no relation to the size of his penis.

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "What can I get for ya?" The man replies, "A beer."

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was very scary.

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Customer Service "May I help you?" "Yes."

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What do you call a tall midget? Well tall is a relative term so a midget may be considered tall compared to something or someone shorter. Say if a midget was compared to a baby he/she would be considered tall, considering the baby's small height. However midgets are looked at short by most people who are taller than them because of their physical problem that they can do nothing about.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A bike

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Why shouldn't you try to pick up a live scorpion with your teeth? Because it could easily sting your face, or mouth.

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What is brown and smells bad? A white person that had been bathed in brown paint, and didn't shower for the next month, and rubbed poop all over them, and rubbed diarrhea all over them and rubbed rock poop all over them and rubbed pee all over them, and rubbed mud all over them, and pooped in a bottle.

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A black guy and a Mexican are in a car, who is driving? They take turns due to the fact it is a long trip.

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whats the point of anti jokes? A: the point that it is no point

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Q: What did hitler say to his generals? a: In a circumstance as the one we have found ourselves in. Eliminating our most threatening of enemies would be very logical. Unless they were of the superior race therefore, it may be frowned apon by our low ranked comrades. Causing another assasionation attempt on myself. So in conclusion I believe eliminating a rich and intelligent race far more superior than our own, would be the best way to go. So collect the Jews of Warsaw and we might have a chance.

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What's the difference between a black man and a bench? A bench is nonsentient, generally heavier and not necessarily light-dark brown colored, whereas the black man is fully capable of thinking and usually has dark toned skin.

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Because Einstein said so. According to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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Why did two girls need one cup? they didnt feel like washing an extra dish to drink their coca cola

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What did the group of black men do to the old white woman? Gave her back the purse she dropped.

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race-car = rac-ecar

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A house comes around the corner.

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why is six afraid of seven? because seven is black

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womens rights

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Your mom is so fat, when she farts, I can use her underwear as a hot air balloon

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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