When were in a zombie apocalypse I will make sure to save you for 40 days and then I will sacrifice you

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"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "I am." "Okay, come in."

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Roses are red Violets are blue Im really bad at poetry Your mums a whore

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Why did the orphans kill timmy? timmy said a your mom joke.

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Knock, knock! Who's there? No one. No one actually knocked on your door because this is just a joke.

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How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? A wood chuck could chuck as much wood as a wood chuck would if a wood chuck could chuck wood.

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Why couldn't the man ever reach his dream of becoming a professional athlete? He was pronounced with Alzheimer at a young age and could never remember his dream the next day.

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people who spank you sure are a pain in the ass.

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A man sees another man standing at the edge of a tall bridge looking down. Man: Don't jump! No one wants you to die. You have your whole life to live and I'm sure you will find happiness somewhere. I was once in the same position as you, questioning if god really wanted me on this earth at all. But I decided to make something of myself and now I am a very successful business man. You can do the same if you just put your mind to it and put your troubles behind you. Other man: I was just admiring the view.

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Why did the black man grab and tie up the white woman? Because the white woman was a serial killer who has been on the FBI's most wanted list for killing children.

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Knock knock Fuck off!

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See you later... Just joke I'm blind

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Who jumps the highest in basketball? The mascot because he has a trampoline.

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Q: What's worse than a pile of dead babies in a truck? A: A pile of dead babies in a truck with one alive in the middle eating his way out.

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Roses are potatoes Violets are potatoes I like potatoes Potatoes.

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A jew walked out of a bar then goes to the other bar across the street then walks out from the back door to go to another bar The Actions of this jew tells us that there are only 3 bars in the zone and one pet shop

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Why didn't little Billy cross the road? He was dead.

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Great ideas: Go to your facebook account and type in: Man, I am gonna suicide right now, bye! Moral: Now if you do it as well, nah, dont do it, seriously... Just type it!

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How did the dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the leg of a chicken.

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Three black men walk into a gas station and don't steal anything.

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What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? A bike

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What did the lawyer say to the doctor? - I am a lawyer and you're a doctor.

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How do you make a dog say meow? Freeze it and put it through a woodchipper. (MEROWRRRR)

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Why couldn't the T-Rex clap his hands? He was dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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