What do Justin Bieber and Eminem have in common? They both need to get a life. I lied about Eminem.

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whats big and green and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? a snooker table

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Q: What's black and hangs from a tree? A: A tire swing.

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What do you call a black man that is wearing a suit? Whatever his name happens to be

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What happens after Madeline McCann disappears. Jokes.

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A gorilla walks into a bar. It goes on a killing spree, and is promptly put down by animal control.

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im gonna poop my pants. mom said to wipe afterwards i am a teletubby

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What does the ship say when it's cold? Shiver me timbers

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Why did the police arrest the black man? He'd committed a crime, and was punished accordingly.

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a dog walks into a bar....it sees the horse and starts barking which ever dentally startles and confuses the horse resulting in tables and chairs being knocked over .

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Why are there so many blacks in prison? *The rest of this joke has been removed to avoid causing offence*

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What's big long, harry, and has glowing eyes? I dont know. Its under my bed. PLEASE SEND HELP!!!

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Modern math questions: If I have 9 apples and you have 12 ice cubes, his many pancakes fit on a roof? Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue.. And IDGAF!

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A brunette, a blond and a red-head decide to go swimming in a lake. To prepare, they go shopping together to get some new bikinis. When they get to the shop they are pleased to find that the bikinis are on sale and they get them 50% off. They drive with their new swimwear to the lake and get changed in the changing room. When they get out they notice that it is quite cold. They decide to go swimming anyway. They notice that the lake is dirty. They decide to go swimming anyway. They notice the lake is actually a spill of oil. They decide to go swimming anyway. They remember that none of them can swim. They decide to go swimming anyway. They jump in. They drown.

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a black, mexican, jewish, and white man fall off a cliff, who landed first ? all at the same time, they all died and there familys sued the clifff and commited sucicede

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Hay is for horses and other hay consuming mammals.

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Why did the man throw the clock out the window? Because he saw his ex-girlfriend walking down the street so he was trying to kill her by hitting her in the head with the clock.

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What do a rubix cube and a penis have in common? The more you play with it the harder it gets.

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Why did a little boy have a black eye? Because his father is very abusive to him and his sister. They are beaten every dad after the father comes home drunk from the bar because his wife also the kids mother died in a car acciedent 1 month before this. Child abuse is not funny and neither is a dead mother.

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The Ohio State Buckeyes

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What is the difference between a pile of baby's and a new jeep? I don't have a brand new jeep in my garage.

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What does a black person and ebola have in common? They both kill people

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What did the Jew say to the German? Yes I would like fries with that.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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