I asked my wife to make me a sandwich. I had forgotten she was dead.

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8================D-------- (.Y.)

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Why did the chicken cross the road? 'Cause he wanted to get squashed by the giant pancake.

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25

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why was kade sad? he shit himself

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What's big with fat all over it? Your mom on this dick

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what do you do when you see a black man punching a girl? act like you dont see it and get the hell out of harms way

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I'm a vegan thats why I am still a Virgin.

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what do You call a white man killing a black man? a accident

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Why couldn't the woman give her sister a present? Because she just got eaten by zombies.

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A man walked into a bar. He needed 5 stitches.

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Why couldn't Bob pick up his pen? Because a nuclear bomb just set off where he lives and it incinerated everything.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock -Who's there Not Sarah

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So a Mexican a Jew and a Philippino walk across the street What Happened? the border patrol shot them

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Your mom is so fat that she turns "One Size Fits All" to "One Size Fits Most"

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What do you call a black man with a lip desiese? Jumbo shrimp

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How do you put a baby to sleep? Snap its neck.

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Q: Whats worst than the Holocaust A: If a second Holocaust happened, and then you found an apple in your apple

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs because disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion).

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What's worse then a worm in your apple? When your apples a human

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oh no a butt!!!!!!!!!! your stubid oh wait your right ahhhhhhhhhh

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A man walks into a bar. He I then taken to the hospital for a major head injury.

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Whats red and has wheels? An apple, I was just kidding about the wheels.

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Who has two thumbs and lost them? Me but I can't really point at myself due to the lack of thumbs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops