What did one cannibal say to the other cannibal? Nothing, because he was eating him.

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How do you get a clown off of a swing? You throw an axe at its face.

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What did one lawyer say to the other? We are both lawyers. What did the stupid lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both pineapples.

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kennah campion when she talks

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What's the difference between an alien and Obama? - Nothing they are both aliens.

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What's the difference between epistemological pluralism.

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Its behind you like if you looked behind

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What did the fish say when he ran into a cement wall? ....Nothing fish don't run What did the fish say when he swam into a cement wall? ...Damn

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What do you call a tall midget? Well tall is a relative term so a midget may be considered tall compared to something or someone shorter. Say if a midget was compared to a baby he/she would be considered tall, considering the baby's small height. However midgets are looked at short by most people who are taller than them because of their physical problem that they can do nothing about.

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You are so dumb that you receive poor grades in school.

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Excuse me sir, do you know where I can find the restroom? I don't know, I'm sorry.

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Did u hear about the jew that bought something not on sale? Neither did i.

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Q: if it takes a week to walk a fortnight how many pounds of oranges can you fit in a grapegruit. A: None, because there is no bones in ice cream

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What did Johnny get for Christmas? Drugs, Johnny was a convicted drug dealer, age 19.

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When life gives you lemons, you make lemonade. Well, that's going to be some horrible lemonade if life doesn't also give you water and sugar.

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what did the soup kitchen give people for christmas Meatloaf] -Fluzturnusturbusturcusterdustur

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's wife? Neither has he.

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Why did the bald man go to hospital? Because we was getting chemotherapy

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What does it take to shit in a shower?? To choke on a whambar and be 90 kgs!

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What is worde then swallowing a slipper? Swallowing a granny to catch the slipper

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Two great white sharks are swimming in the ocean together, one turns to the other to speak, but doesn't because sharks can't talk.

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Two guys walk into a bar.... OUCH

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ur left leg is cristmas nd ur right leg is thanks giving can i vist

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What is small, cries a lot, and moves at high speeds? A baby stapled to a car.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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