Why couldn't the boy watch the DVD about pirates? Because his mother did not understand the importance of putting the disc back in it's case after use, and as a result, has become too damaged for the DVD Player to play.

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What did the golfer do on his vacation? He played golf.

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why did the man beat his wife? why not?

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what is black and green and rainy all over? the democratic republic of congo

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was hit by a fridge.

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A priest walks into a drug den, most people would say this is pretty contradictory to his implied beliefs.

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Two muffins are in an oven one muffin says to the other muffin "It's hot in here" the other muffin says "Holy crap a talking muffin".

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What do you call a guy with a puppy, candy, and a windowless white van? You're next baby sitter.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Chris. Chris who? Wow, I thought we were better friends than that.

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Why did the man cry himself to sleep at night? Because the doctors gave him 3 months to live.

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Why did the cook throw up at McDonalds? Because his pay check was made out to the Ronald McDonald Foundation.

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A rabbi and a priest walk into a bar. The rabbi says "ow my head"

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Why didn't the man give a location of the murderer? He was murdered

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Q: What does Jerry Sandusky and bills have in common? A: They both come in the mail

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What came first... the chicken or the egg? How am I supposed to know?

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What did one Japanese man say to the other? I don't know, I don't speak Japanese.

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A blind man walked into a bar. Quite literally.

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What do a turtle an a bird have in common? They both fly except the turtle

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What did the lawyer say to the doctor? - I am a lawyer and you're a doctor.

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A man walks into a meat shop. Man: I bet you $20 you can't reach the meat on the top shelf. Butcher: The steaks are too high

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Well no, thats not true, sorry, I mean I GET THAT ALL THE FUCKING TIME!

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Why did the boy have to ride the bus? Because both his parents died.

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Whats the best part about having sex with 25 year olds? There 20 of them.

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two peanuts were walking down the street one was assualted

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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