Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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haiku for you ladies and gents My mother once said, "Slow and steady wins the race" She died in a fire.

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A ham sandwich walks into a bar, bartender says "We don't serve food here."

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a jewish person sees a nickel on a sidewalk and continues walking.

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When life gives you lemons, take them. Free stuff is cool.

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Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Your mom is so ugly she often finds it difficult attracting members of the other sex.

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A man walks into a bar and the barman says "Why the long face?" And the man replies "I am severely deformed".

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Why the african children was sad? - Because an octopus bite his arm

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Roses are yellow, Violets are purple, im not color blind you just cant read.

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Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because he was eaten alive!!!

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What do you call a newborn son? The proudest moment of your life. What do you call a newborn daughter? A disappointment.

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Nero, I am happy to hear from you again, but it kinda sounds like you are going to get yourself killed or something. Is there something else I can do? If that asshole is suffering, kill him after he is done doing it, I am done with that piece of shit. Honestly, what is going on Nero? You are not going to suicide or something are you? Please respond, right away, or I wont call your wife.

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whats the difference between marmalade and jam? you cant marmalade ur cock up a girls arse

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Three Jew begin to walk down the street, they then pursue walking and purchase many goodies from vendors.

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Your mom is so ugly- Wait, hold on. How are you born?

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Question: What do you call the black guy wearing a white shirt? Answer: Steve. His parents game him the name at birth, and he is called that ever since.

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Your mother is so fat, she developed diabetes and was rushed to hospital. She might not make it.

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Mom now that I am fourteen can I get a bra now? No Harold!

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What brown and squishy? um um um um melted kit-kats

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There once was a man from Peru, Who dreamed he was eating his shoe, When he woke up one night he discovered with fright, That the friendly old neighbor from next door had broken into his house with a chain saw in an alcohol-induced murder attempt.

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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whats better than the london bridge burning down... all the jews burning down and getting put in bins .

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A duck walks into a bar. The duck walks over to the bartender and orders a beer. "put it on my bill." he says. The bartender angrily grabs the duck and kicks him out of the bar, because the duck has done this many times, but has never once paid his bill to the bar. The duck is an alcoholic and is slowly ruining his relationship with his family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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