Every time I walk across the street I do the Hitler march and raise my arm straight out to salute him, if I feel like holding up traffic, I take smaller steps

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You trying to be funny kid? This is a matter of security to the national degree, point zero has been compromised, unless you bring out one of these soon, I am myself going to drag your ass into prison.

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how many dicks can you fit into mia khalifa's ass

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Paper or plastic? Yes...

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Why did little jimmy fall of the playground? He was blind and wasn't aware of his surroundings

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How many midgets does it take to change a light bulb? If you do the math, it's probably one.

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My father stole my mothers heart, he's in jail for murder

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What is Blue, Pink, and Green, and sometimes sparkles when wet? Grass. I lied about the Blue and Pink to throw you off...because I can.

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A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

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Q: What's red and bad for your teeth? A: Bricks.

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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What do the holocaust and new born babies have in common? Nothing. Except some babies are born in Germany.

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What did the red fish say to the blue fish? Nothing fish can't talk.

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did you hear about the dyslexic journalist? he employed an assistant to double check his work. They worked really well together.

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My cat just died.

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why did the man ride the helicopter,because he was hurt horrible in a car accident.

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Why couldn't the infant read the book? Because he was blind.

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Crime in a hen house. All hens killed. Police found the suspected fox quickly and asked him if he have done it. No - he said. But it was him.

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Jake pulled out a gun and held it to his head, planning to fool his friends because he knew the gun was empty. Then his friend thought he was helping out his suicidal friend by stabbing him.

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Roses are gray, violets are blue; I'm red-green colorblind so I occasionally have difficulty seeing most shades of red or green.

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What did the child say to the clown? For a professional entertainer, you're not that funny.

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What's better than winning a gold medal at the paralympics? Winning two gold medals.

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If Johnny has 4 dollars and Clarissa has 7 dollars, how many dollars do they have all together? 11 dollars Knock knock Who's There? Johnny Johnny who? Johnny and Clarrisa, all together we have 11 dollars.

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jasper walks into a bar, he sees an elephant and can't believe his eyes. he says "HORGWARSH!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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