How many Babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends how hard you throw them

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Q:How do you get better at boxing? A:Get a bigger package Daniel W. Schnurr

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A black man and a white man crash their cars. they promptly exchange insurance information and apologize to each other about the inconvenience.

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What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

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What is the similarity between Moses and Muhammad? They both have the same letter starting their names

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What did the grizzly bears have for lunch? Fish and tourists.

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knock knock whos there? ughh omg youre dying what yeah dear god ok ill call 911 no im fine its just a seizure ok get well soon

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What did the man say when he put his penis in the blender? Arghhhhhhh!

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Think of a number, add it by 7, subtract it by 2, and multiply it by 4. Now close your eyes, isn't it dark?

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Why did the Albino cross the road? He was going to the skin pigment store.

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What did the sailor say to the shore? Ur a beach!

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How do you get a jewish girls number check her wrist

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What's the difference between a baby and a trampoline? I actually take my shoes off when I jump on the trampoline.

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what do mexicans cross? whatever they want. but in this case their local grocery store parking lot to buy fresh produce.

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What did boy with now arms and no legs get for christmas A pogo-stick

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Why did the baby cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

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A leper sees that a woman has dropped a bag of groceries on the sidewalk. "Hey ma'am, can I give you a HAND?" asks the leper. "No thank you, sir. I can manage." replies the woman. "That's a relief," laughs the leper, shyly. "I am quite weak due to leprocy."

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What do you call a cat in a piece of bred? An inbred cat.

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"Why is Barney purple and green?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way"

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What did the Taliban teenager strap on his chest before getting on the bus? A blue rubber dildo.

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How do you get a Jew to jump off a cliff? You kidnap his family and threaten to kill them if he doesn’t.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was an animal with a small brain and could not comprehend the situation.

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Q: Why was the little boy late for school? A: His face was stapled to a wall.

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A man walks into a bar and asks the bartender can you throw me a beer and the bartender says yes and he throws him the beer and the man says I can't catch I have the smallest hands in the world and the bartender says go across the street there is a guineas book of world record store an check if you h e the smallest hands and he does so the next day he goes back and asks for another beer and the bartender throws him a beer and say I cant catch cause I have the smallest feet in the world and he goes across the street and checks and he does and then the third day he goes back to the bar and asks for a beer and the bartendor throws him another beer and says I can't catch I have the smallest penis in the world so he goes to the guiness book o world record store and then goes bac to the bar and asks..... Who's austin bell?????

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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