What's the difference between a clown and a dead baby? One makes people laugh and the other is a clown.

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Q: What's not funny and has three wheels? A: The Holocaust, I lied about the wheels and not being funny.

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What's worse than seeing Helen Keller behind the wheel of a car? Being run over by Helen Keller.

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ROSES ARE RED, VIOLETS ARE BLUE, I OFFERED YOU SOME CEREAL, MADE OUT OF MY DOGS POO BY VICKY AND RENATA WOHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

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A man dies and goes to heaven. This is an assumption based on religious faith.

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What's worse then mud on your shoes. Being assassinated by means of a dart to the throat.

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A man died.

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Life is like a box of chocolates, some are brown, and some are white.

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why did the girl fall of her bike She had no arms

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I took my sick iguana to the Vet. He said why did you bring him to me, a former soldier?

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What do you call a dog with no legs? Doesn't matter what you call it, they aren't going to come.

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Why did the cat scratch the person? Because it's mean.

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A black guy walks into a bar with a dog. He is asked to leave because his dog is not on a lead.

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What is the definition of child abuse? Ms Bazan

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how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop 397, IF you have a big tounge

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage?

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what do you call a chicken thats little? a chicken. I lied about the little part

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To men walk into a bar. One says to a paying customer, "Mind if I sit here?" and the other man inquires the bartender about so.e fancy drink that takes five minutes to prepare. After 23 minutes, naturally, they left at exactly the same time and they went home to their wife and kids. They both share a wife and kids.

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What happened when the black man tried to cross the road Nothin. He tripped on a bug trying to get on the edge

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I'm not quite sure, but I just realized that my new pair of boxer briefs has ripped along the seam. Oh, and earlier this morning, I stubbed my toe pretty bad. The nail is all purple and the toe is all swollen, it was bleeding profusely until I put three bandages over the wound. It's still throbbing with pain. Oh, and also, a few months ago, I lost my job. It wasn't because I was constantly late or anything, it was more because as a server, I had been required to lift trays and stand and walk for the entirety of my shift. The only problem is, that about a year ago, I was involved in a serious car accident (once again, an occurrence that had not been due to my own actions). This car accident severed my spine in the L5 region. I can now barely walk for long periods of time, I find it impossible to run, I can no longer play sports and enjoy being a 21 year old male. I am in constant pain and it affects my breathing, my legs, the rest of my back, and also my teeth (due to the neurological connections dealing with the spinal cord). I am now currently looking for a new job, a more suitable job, to help sustain my hectic lifestyle. No, it is not a lifestyle of parties and what not, it is merely the lifestyle of living under roof and owning a used car. I have an alcoholic mother and my childhood was devoid a father. I raised myself, and to this day, I still have no family to help me through my financial struggles. I need nearly 2000 dollars in less than a week in order to pay all my bills, have my car fixed, and eat for another month. The only problem is, I have a dollar and 58 cents to my name. I wish I was this chicken, crossing roads, and what not, not just to get to the other side, but to live a better life. But, one can only wish.

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You wanna know what's totally out of this world? The moon.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Q: how do you test the sharpness of a knife A: stab someone MR

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream. Because he got hit by a bus

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops