Why should you never push a Mexican off a bike? Because he will file a lawsuit against you in the event of an injury.

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What did one new born baby say to the other new born baby.? Babies don't have teeth therefore they are unable to talk.

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Why did the deaf man ask for directions? He didn't as he knew he wouldnt have a clue what they are on about.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your bipolar aunt so don't ask again.

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What's worse than eating spinach? Dying.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who cares?

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being raped by a giant scorpion.

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A jew, a black, and a gay are walking together. The black points out a new house.

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Kids, your mother and I thought we should tell you this now... You know our dog sparky? Well he... was actually Osama bin Laden and is now dead!

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A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

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What's the difference between a baby and a tea bag? Tea bags don't scream when I dip them in boiling water

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Man: What is the meaning of life? God: Buffalo wings. Lots and lots of buffalo wings.

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Yo mama's so fat, she had a lap-band procedure.

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What did the man say to his wife while having sex? I don't know.

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Why did the black man buy a gun? Because he and his family live in a dangerous neighborhood.

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Whats the diffrence between a white and a black guy? one of them is black

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someone called someone else a frog

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wanna hear a cat joke? just kitten

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Word Problem Q.John has 32 candy bars. He eats twenty eight of them. What does he have now? A. Diabetes. John has Diabetes.

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Why did the pencil break? A Viking destroyed it with his beard.

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Whats blind and deaf? Hellen Keller.

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What's the worst joke ever? Justin Bieber.

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A white man and a drunken black man enters the bar, the bartender calls the cop and the black man is dragged into the police car. The black man screams YOU ARE RACIST! YOU DAMN RACISTS! The cops tell him he has been walking around the streets naked the last 2 days... Oooh... I am really sorry sir says the black man. He was forgiven and went sober forever. Moral: No moral, that is the anti moral in this anti joke...and besides I am a W class celebrity.enjoy life

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There's a donut on a cruise ship and he goes up to the captain and he's like "hey captain can I drive the cruise ship" and the captain goes "nope, come back tomorrow" so the next day the donut goes up to the captain and says "hey captain can I drive the cruise ship" and the captain replies "nope, come back tomorrow" so the next day the donut goes up to the captain and he's like "hey captain can I drive the cruise ship" and the captain says "NO!" and throws him over board Theres a couple on the cruise ship and the man was going to have a romantic dinner with his girlfriend and propose. So he was showing his bestfriend (who was also on the cruise ship) the ring. But was he pulled it out the wind picked up and the ring fell over board. So the man was forced to have a romantic dinner with his girlfriend and couldn't propose. So they go to dinner and the both get crab. And when they open up the crab and guess what's in the crab?! Not the ring the donut!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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