Why did the black man eat KFC? Because he got hungry.

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Repeat after me... I'matote ulbu twad Now say that all together Im a total butt wad

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A Mexican walks into a bar. He walked out with a concussion. -ilikecrepes97

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Why did the blonde walk into the bar? To get a beer.

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What's the opposite of a joke? An anti-joke. You're reading one right now.

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Who cured cancer? Not God. What do you think of the almighty now?

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What's green, has six legs and lives in the jungle? A Snooker Table.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To try to get the antidote for his dying baby chick.

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How many babies does it take to tile a roof? Depends how thinly you slice them

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A man walks into a bar. He is then taken to the hospital for his concussion, seeing as the bar was made of metal

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What did one dead baby say to the other dead baby? Nothing, they are both dead.

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How do unwed mothers celebrate Mother's Day? The same way all mothers do.

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ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSUCKMYDICK

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Q: How many lightbulbs does it take to screw in a dog house, if your parents are a washing machine and a dryer? A: Trick Question, dog houses can't fly!

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Q:why did the guy go to the doctor? A:I dunno, he must have gone for a good reason

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What's Kanye West's goal in life? To dash the hopes and dreams of Taylor Swift on national television.

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whats better than the london bridge burning down... all the jews burning down and getting put in bins .

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A duck walks into a bar. The duck walks over to the bartender and orders a beer. "put it on my bill." he says. The bartender angrily grabs the duck and kicks him out of the bar, because the duck has done this many times, but has never once paid his bill to the bar. The duck is an alcoholic and is slowly ruining his relationship with his family.

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What do you get when you throw a piano down a mine shaft? A flat minor.

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Before Marriage: Boy: Ah at last. I can hardly wait. Girl: Do you want me to leave? Boy: No don't even think about it. Girl: Do you love me? Boy: Of Course. Always have and always will. Girl: Have you ever cheated on me? Boy: Never. Why are you even asking? Girl: Will you kiss me? Boy: Every chance I get. Girl: Will you hit me? Boy: Hell no. Are you crazy? Girl: Can I trust you? Boy: Yes. Girl: Darling! After Marriage: (Read from bottom to top)

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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How many Soviet Russians does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, in Soviet Russia, light bulbs are an unavailable commodity because the tyrannical government has called for a ban on unnatural illumination. A fact which is not lost on Mikhail, the light bulb maker whose wife died because his lack of business caused him to miss payments on his hospital bills.

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A devout Christian dies– Peter winks as his soul passes through the impenetrable Gates of Heaven. Everyone is gay and– like, gay as in happy– Homosexuals aren't allowed in.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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