My mother has great posture. She's paralyzed from the neck down.

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What time is it? If I hadn't poked your eyes out, you might know.

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What do you get when you cross a lion and a tiger? A Ligor.

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What did little Timmy get for Christmas after he was diagnosed with leukemia? A gift card to Bed Bath and Beyond because he was interested in redecorating.

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A guy walks into a bar. No one notices he has epilepsy.

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A man walked into a bar. He then sat down and ordered a drink.

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Why didnt the chicken cross the road? He was chicken.

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kkkk

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Lollies are sweet warheads are sour, open your legs and feel my power

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Q: Whats more funny than a pile of dead babies? A: The one in the center eating its way out

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How many babies does it take to paint a barn? It depends on how hard you throw them

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What's better than winning a gold medal in the Paralympics ? Not being disabled

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Why did the muffin not eat the other muffin. Because muffins do not have a digestive system.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Your physician, you're going to die.

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What is the proper response when someone says "My family died in a car crash"? Lol fail

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I have existed for over 6000 years and around vi0lating people long before you where ever born kid... You do not believe me you say? friendly r*pist neighbourhood Moral Man: You do not believe me? According to this DNA test... Welcome to papa son/daughter... Its time to make you a man/woman now, and then TIME TO MAKE YOU my BlTCH!

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people who spank you sure are a pain in the ass.

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What was the black woman doing in the kitchen? She was simply washing her hands after eating dinner.

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What do you call a Pakistani flying a plane. 9/11

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what is black and blue and hates sex? the ten year old in my trunk.

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In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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What did the monkey say to the Pope and the Queen? Good evening, Your Holiness. Good evening, Your Majesty,

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Why did the man give money to a drug dealer? He lost a bet.

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Ask me if i'm a tree. Are you a tree? No. okay? Why did the chicken cross the road? why? because its motor skills allowed it to cross. dude, seriously? What did Jimmy's grandmother get him for Christmas? What?. Nothing she died two years ago. that's horrible. When did she die? On his birthday. Dude, stop! Wait how did she die? Fine, How? She was driving down the road and swerved to miss a chicken. oh. And what did she hit? UGGG What? Thankfully not me. because I wasn't the tree. :0 oooooooooooooh

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops