To the 'am i pregnant now?'-section: Yesterday I spilled mustard on my brand new pants. That was just before I went out to some clubs. That night, after I had enjoyed myself with friends and alcohol, while I was walking home I was raped several times by big, black and hung men. It hurt a lot and my anus is still bleeding. My question is: What is the best way to get rid of the mustard stain?

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Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease

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What did the girl say to the guy who poked her on Facebook? You poked me.

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What do you call black people working in a field? Farmers.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I just sharpened this hatchet Don't make me use it!

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You can lead a horse to water, but you can't suck its dick.

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A lawyer walks into a bar, and due to the repercussions of severe head trauma was never able to do so again.

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Why did the man cross the road? He was in a state of depression and chose to commit suicide.

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What's big, black, and just knocked an 8 year old girl off of her bike? The refrigerator I just threw at her. (not all are white you know)

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roses are red, violets are blue, i dont like to rhyme, but i do like to poo.

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Ask me if im a tree Are you a tree no

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says why the long face? The horse says my mom died from cancer

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dat shoe shine tho

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good looking women

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What do you get when you cross a computer with a whore? A:porn

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How do you make a fat man cry? You call him fat.

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A baby walks into a bar, not long before it leaves out of the bar.

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How do you kill a shark blindfolded? You untie the blindfold.

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How do you get a baby in a bowl? You put it in.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer murdered his family

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What did the man say when he saw a alien? "Look its a Alien"

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I remember the last words my grandpa said before he kicked the bucket. I bet I can kick this bucket. He missed and had a heart attack.

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What did the white male say to the black male who had just robbed a bank? I'm glad you have a reliable source of income to feed yourself and your family

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What did little Ben's mom give him for Christmas? Nothing. She died last month

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops