How many dead babies can you fit in the trunk of a car? Depends on the car.

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…What did you put in the drink that made me fart, and kill my horse?

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How do you find out a chinese's name? Ask him/her

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What did the man do when he ran out of milk? He went to the store to get some more milk!

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How did the black kid get in school? By taking the bus.

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Why did Suzy cross the road? She didn't she got hit by a bus. Knock, knock! Who's there? Not Suzy!

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Why did the man launch his rocket into the sun? He didn't. Overcoming the sun's orbital pull would require your rocket to travel ~7,400,000 mph, which is a velocity that is impossible for today's rockets to reach.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting a girl pregnant.

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there once was a chicken it was yellow

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What's similar between the Alabama Crimson Tide and a maggot? They've both been feeding off of a dead Bear for 30 years...

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Do not be unreasonable now, as for the twenty five million dollars, it is the least I can do, but if we cannot agree upon acting with some reason and dignity, as refraining from insults, then no conflict will ever be solved... ...I will send you my contact information shortly, expect the money within the week, three or four days tops. Would you be interested in learning more about our order? We make good use of people such as you. With all due respect, I would not exactly lend my sister to anybody that brags about engaging into intercourse with his own sister.

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If you're American when you go into the bathroom , and you're American when you go into the bathroom, what are you when you're in the bathroom. Ha, joke is on you because Americans don't pee.

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U are with a jew a Christian and a muslim, you walk in chicken shop, thw lights close, and all of a sudden, hitler and a vampire pop up. Which one do you kill? The jew.

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Why did the guy stay up all night on the internet? because hes a fat ugly bastard with no life

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What happens when a toad is struck by lightning? The same thing that happens to everything else.

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what happens when you put Rihanna and Chris brown in the same room? Rihanna dies

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Why did the chicken cross the playground? Thats what she said

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What's worse than finding a worm in your pork? Finding half of a worm, because the worm you just ate is going to live in your stomach, breed, then come out your butt. Or the Apocalypse.

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What did the dinosaur say to the other dinosaur? We are both dinosaurs.

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why did the guy cross the road? Because he felt like it

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Why was the little boy sad? Because he just got paralized from the waist down and will never be able to walk again.

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What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? Pants.

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What are you going to get your mom for mothers day? I have two gay dads.

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What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is an Italian food that is an American favorite, and the other is a follower of Judaism.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops