I have a black friend that recently went to the doctor for a full checkup. I saw him today, and he we was dressed to the nines in a very expensive suit. "What's with the suit," I asked. "My doctor told me I'm impotent! So I thought, if I'm going to be impotent, then it'll be harder to attract a long term mate without the ability to give her children someday. So I've decided to showcase my impeccable taste in style to make up for it." He seemed really bummed out, so I gave him a hug and we went and had some ice cream.

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A used condom filled with water and left on a radiator makes an ideal and inexpensive lava lamp.

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last night i was doing some guy in the ass. i went to give him a reach around and the homo had a boner! freakin queer.

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Q: What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? A: Being caught by the store manager, arrested, convicted, and thrown into jail for petty theft and then getting ass-raped for the next 3 months all because you wanted to check an apple without paying for it.

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Knock Knock Who's There The police, your under arrest.

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What did the man on the moon say? ...Im on the moon.

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Jack and Jeff went up a hill to fetch a pail of water, They both turned gay, and had some sex, and now they have HIV

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What should you do if you have a 10 inch penis? Subtly tell the world via an anti-joke

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Q:Why is rugby one of the safest sports to play? A: It isn't , it is in fact very dangerous.

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A homeless guy walked up to me and said "Any change?", to which I replied, "Nope, your still homeless". We laughed and laughed. The he stabbed me.

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A Palestinian woman asks a man for directions. She is promptly stoned to death.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The electrician, I'm here to fix your door bell.

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what's better than being stabbed in the testicles with a biro? the Silversun Pickup's album Neck of the Woods

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There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

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Japan

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Why is moral man a great Cerebrity? you would not get it, its too cerebral... Moral: I SAID LEAVE HIM ALONE PLEAAAAAAAAAASE! BUAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHA!

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knock knock... who's there? uninterrupted cow uninterrupted cow who?? exactly....

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What's the same between a grape and an airplane? they both have wings but the grape doesn't

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Roses are Red Violets are blue This joke isn't funny And neither are you!

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whats worse than failing your maths test?

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"So, what do you fancy doing tonight?" "Does it matter? We'll end up doing what you want anyway..."

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What do you get when you put a baby in a blender New Doritos Dip

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Sally heard a scream in a dark room and went to go see who it was. Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Sally...

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Why was the boy sad? A crazed drifter killed his family and made him watch.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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