A one legged man walks into a bar and falls down.

Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. He had multiple MRI's and bodily fluid tests to confirm the diagnosis. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research. 12% of the donated money went into studying the medicinal effects of Twinkies.

a blind man walks off a cliff..... he's dead now.

How many babies does it take to paint a barn? It depends on how hard you throw them

roses are red, no one gives a shit, get back in the kitchen and bring me my chicken dips!

Q: Why did the black man drown? A: Because he couldn't swim.

You're so sweet I have diabetes

Yo dawg, I heard you like cars. Thats cool, whats your favorite one?

What's wore then finding a worm in your apple? Being the only person to survive a plane crash over Alaska, then having to eat your family in order to stay alive waiting for help to come.

What do you call a fat ginger kid? Whatever his name is.

What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

Yo mama's so fat that when she goes into a clothing store, she often feels self-conscious about having to buy larger than average clothing sizes than most people.

a man walked into a bar and ordered a beer. The Bartender says okay, here you go.

The other day a male African American approached me in a less than reputable neighborhood after dark and inquired as to whether or not I had a dollar which I could spare. I politely told him I didn't and apologized. He forgave me and we went our seperate ways.

woman's rights

What stops a train? A missile

How old are you? 7

How do you get a baby to stop crying? Run it over with a lawn mower!

A man walks into a bar with an octopus. He tells the bartender that his octopus can play any instrument. The bartender gives the octopus bag pipes. The octopus fiddles with the bag pipes but can't seem to play them. The man gives the bag pipes back to the bartender and leaves with his octopus. He is quite embarassed and decided to get bagpipe lessons for his octopus.

Why did the all black baseball team beat the all white baseball team? Because the black team scored more runs than the white team.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the lesbian's house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

A man walks into a bar later at night & the bartender says how was your day the man replies "well I found out my mom is a raging crack addict, my grampa has alzheimer's & i have terminal cancer" how was yours the bartender says "I found out im Hitlers lost son".

Yo mamma's so short that she is 12 inches below the average height of a woman at her age.

What did the Colombian say to the Peruvian? Quieres lleyo?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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