Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first one says "Boy, it sure is hot in here." The second one says "Holly shit! A talking muffin!" As muffins generally don't talk.

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One linners President Kinnedy did you like the parade President Lincon did you like the play

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Buy a SHOTGUN!!!!

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Why did the man jump into the river? He wanted to go for a swim, but the pool was closed, so he swam in the river.

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Why can't so many guys get it up? Because erectile dysfunction affects 30 million men nationwide.

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So 2 guys are curious if there is baseball I heaven... So they say when either of them dies they have to come back as a spirit and tell the other man if there is baseball in heaven One of the guys dies and comes back as a spirit... He comes to the other man and says... I've got some good news and some bad news The man says what's the the good news? The spirit says the good news is there is baseball in heaven So the man says what's the bad news?? The spirit says... Your pitching Tuesday night!

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Why did the airplane crash? A loaf of bread was the pilot.

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Josh Moran peels off his foreskin while watching gay porn.

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My friends told me they found a dead women....they said they pissed on her........that was my mom

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A man with a PhD walks up to a college student and jokingly says "Hey dude, what did the hat say to the other hat?" The student replies "My name is Joe and a hat does not have a mouth, therefore it cannot speak." The student is then unimpressed on how uneducated the man is, also worring about how the man was able to receive a PhD.

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Why did a white man get kicked out of the Olympics 2012¿ Because he did not have down syndrome

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i am 26 why was i kidnapped 13 years ago cause i was in a badly written play

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Where were guinea pigs created? Probably in Guinea Land or something.

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Whats worst than finding a worm in your apple? Going to antijoke.com instead of anti-joke.com

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A kid who lost parents is called an orphan and a wife who lost her husband is called a widow. What do you call parents who lost their child? Free on the Weekends.

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Why did the jew go into the gas chamber? Because he thought he was going to get a shower.

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I'd love to submit an anti joke, but unfortunatley I don't own a computer.

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What's the difference between acne and Michael Jackson? One is a an unsightly blemish that appears on your skin and the other is a dead pop singer.

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Next time someone says "I have mad money"... Say "whys it mad"

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Sunflowers are yellow, Daises are white.

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What's the difference between an apple? An red fox's enzyme defragmenting on tue.

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"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." The man of the house subsequently notifies his government that genetic engineering is going awry.

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What's Worse Than Falling Over? .......Rape.

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You know whats annoying? Steve

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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