I hate when people see me at the store and are like "What are you doing here??" and Im just like, "Oh, you know, hunting elephants..."

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead become stranded on a desert island. As they are searching for food and shelter, they come across a mystical-looking lamp. They rub the lamp, but nothing happens because genies don't exist.

Chuck Norris tried to return some jeans to Target and when they didn't give him his money he kickeed them in the face.

why did the chicken cross the road? he was an escaped mental paitent

What did the Jewish man get for his birthday? Pork.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was walking.

Why did Gary have severe learning difficulties? Because his mother drank a lot of alcohol while she was pregnant, and it harmed his development significantly.

What's even funnier than 24? A clown in a tree.

Why did the bald man go to hospital? Because we was getting chemotherapy

Why did the black man go to hospital? To cure his black.

What is life? Paul.

You can talk the talk - but can you walk the walk?

What did the Japanese kid get for his birthday? Nothing, his gifts were washed away.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the sidewalk he was on does not.

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because it was cooked with eleven herbs and spices.

Chuck Norris farted and... several people looked around uncomfortably, not knowing how to react to the embarrassing situation.

What's better than rape? Consensual sex.

I do like haikus even when they are random refrigerator

roses are blue violets are red crap i screwed up dont judge me

Roses are red, Violets are blue, This is a poem about Red rosses and blue violets

What's funnier than ten dead babies nailed to one tree? Nothing, infant mortality is not a laughing matter.

What did the black man say when he jumped in the pool? The water's nice, you should join me.

why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a rapist

Why didn't Jane go to school last Thursday? It was summer. No one went to school last Thursday.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...