What do a priest, a rabbi, and an asian have in common? They all don't know each other.

Albert <3 Hunter

What did Santa say when he came to drop off your toys? Nothing. Santa doesn't exist.

My house is on fire I'll probably die posting this joke

Knock Knock. Who's There? Nobody, this is a metaphorical door..

What do an elephant and a can of soup have in common? They both can't ride a bike

What did one Japanese man say to the other? I don't know, I don't speak Japanese.

How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

What is the diffrence between you and I. I am not sure because i have not meet you yet

Two muffins are in an oven. They say absolutely nothing because they're muffins and not sentient.

Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red Paint

Can you get me a stapler,but make sure it has staples or else I won't be able to staple anything

Why'd the plane crash? Because the pilot was an orange.

Whats the difference between a squirrel and a grape? They're both squirrels but ones a grap...

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? That is not nearly as important as how to cure cancer so let's not worry about it.

What's the difference between me and an animal? I'm human

How do you find the richest person in Mexico? You take a survey of all citizens that live in the country of Mexico, find the wealth of each individual person, and whoever has the most money is the richest person in Mexico.

How did the Jewish man play racquetball? With a racket and a birdie.

I was there when Lebron James hit a home run to win the Super Bowl.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme. This one doesn't.

Your momma is so fat, she doesn't have a birthday. She has a birthweek.

whats black white and red all over an abused child

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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