Why did Jimmy not go to school? Because Jimmy, along with his family, were killed in a horrible house fire. Knock Knock? Who's there? Not Jimmy...

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Little Johnny walked into class one day. The teacher announced their would be a pop-quiz on the declaration of independence. Johnny passed. (ic3)

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– Hello. Is this a laundry? – Yes, it is a laundry.

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What is big, white, and heavy ? A fridge

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why did javonne choose club getaway madonna wanted to foster

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What do you call a black man who is flying a plane? A pilot.

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How do you stop a train? You stand in front of it.

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A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

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Wht did noah7262 cross the road? to abandon his friends and play Modern Warfare 3 on xbox live. asshole.

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What's yellow and can't swim? A bulldozer.

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A: Doctor doctor help me! B: Sorry, I'm not actually a doctor, stop calling me that!

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Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? She was blind.

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Hi! Do you know how much a polar bear weighs? Roughly 1150 pounds if a full grow male.

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What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends on what its name is.

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What do you call a gay man? Phil Krahn

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What's the difference between a baby and my trampoline? I take my boots off before i jump on my trampoline. . .

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http://www.booksie.com/declan_mckimm

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Q: What does a psychic have in common with a stone? A: The bible decrees that psychics are witches and should be stoned and something topical about the stone.

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Robocop The Reboot reboot. Watch as The friendly robot named Murphy, is violently broken down by a horrible shower of water, the only means to save him is to transfer his data into a human. He awakens again as Robofriendlydude (starring Adam Sandler) as a robot learns to love, learns to share, learns to dance with children in this years Reboot of the classic love comedy Robocop. PG-3 "So good I could only watch five seconds of it" Rotten potatoes. 99 percent fresh. "Kill me with a chainsaw" Honest reviews. "AWESOME!" Dishonest reviews "Makes Twilight seem like the better lovestory" Everyone.

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Why is a cookie like a jellyfish? Because it has no bones. (Contributed by my 4-year old boy)

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A boy kills DEER & cooks it & doesn't tell friends what it is. He gives a clue "Its what my girlfriend calls Me!..

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Your mom is so fat, when she farts, I can use her underwear as a hot air balloon

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What did one cat say to the other cat? Nothing.

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What is worse than a nuke exploding? Going to the hospital and finding out you have cancer and aids.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops