What is similar between a dog and a cat? They are both dogs except for the cat.

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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How many pollacks does it take to screw in a lightbuld? Likely the same number as is required when people of non-polish descent screw in lightbulds. Overall however it is variable based on the number or bulbs, position of bulbs in relation to ceiling, potential shakiness of required ladder, and desired efficiency. Please reference GE's lightbuld home instillation handbook for further information or alternately contact your local electrician or handy neighbor.

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Why was Armando unable to be found by his friend Ashley ? A: They both were murdered 7 years ago, and bodies are unable to do anything if they lost their soul that was with that body.

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what do you say when you wake up in the middle of the night and see your tv floating thats odd.

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I've got a great new 'Knock Knock Jock

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Romeo and Juliet both die at the end of the book. HAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAAHA i just screwed you guys over.

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Is everything funnier when u have a vagina.

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So, a monkey walks ino a bar... I can't remember the rest of the joke, but your mother is a whore.

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Dumbledore dies.

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Roses are red Violets are violet Why does it go like that anyways? ~Yasmin~

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i'm an inbred jew - Barras

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Ice cream rules kids are great how thinks of this? Michael Jackson

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ert

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What is big green and fuzzy and would kill you if it fell out of a tree A pool table

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Why did a black man bring a baseball bat to a white man's apartment? Because he was stopping by his friends house before heading to a rousing game of baseball.

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roses are red, violets are blue, i have AIDS, now so do you.

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Why did the lamborghini drive off the cliff? Because the person driving was a fridge

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What do a Jew and a homeless man both have in common? They both get nothing for Christmas

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How do you stop your golf ball from hitting a goose? You dont.

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What happens when you mix a camel and a penguin? A cenguin!

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What did the piece of macaroni say as they boy was about to eat him? Nothing. Foods are uneducated and illiterate therefore unable to speak, and went into the boy's mouth without a trouble.

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guy walks into a bar, ouch

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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