A man buys cocaine from a shady dealer in an alley. He then goes home and experiments with it and other chemicals, and later on invents Coca Cola

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flavin's head

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A black guy, a jew, and an asian walk into a bar, have a beer each, and then leave, because they have high-paying jobs and don't want to risk getting DUIs.

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How do you know if elephants are watching a movie? If a Volkswagen Beetle is parked outside the movie house.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? Shit on her face

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Why did the black man offer the girl flowers? It was his niece's birthday.

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* Are you deaf? * Yes, as I love paradoxes.

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What would you call Shaquille O'Neal if he was on the moon? Shaquille O'Neal, or any nickname you may have for him.

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What did the smiley face say to the other smiley face? Nothing. They just smiled.

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what did the little boy say to his mom? nothing his mother died in childbirth.

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A Jew, a Christian, and a Muslim walk into a bar. A good time was had by all, until closing time.

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A man walks into a bar. He hits his head, and then goes to the nearest drinking establishment.

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roses are red violets are blue porn hub is down your mums facebook will do

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? Someone left the gate open.

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Jackie Chan walks into a bar.

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Why did the blonde leave the lamp on while sleeping? Because it helps to see in case you need to get up in the middle of the night. YOU THOUGHT I WAS GOING TO SAY "BECAUSE THEY'RE A LIGHT SLEEPER!" MUAHAHAHAHAHA

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Listen Erron, what`s wrong? I would have told you to go fuck yourself if it where not for the fact that AzureDragon just left for the cafeteria and is nowhere to be seen.

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Wanna know my life in a nutshell? Well you can't. Life is an inanimate object an will therefore not fit inside anything, let alone a nutshell.

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If you die laughting, How are you telling this to me?

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Your mom is so poor she can't afford to buy herself nice things.

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You can lead a fool to wisdom, but you can't make him think.

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What gets louder as it gets smaller? A man in a trash compactor.

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An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman are on a plane. The plan is carrying too much weight, and is destined to crash. They drop the luggage, but there is still too much weight on board. They drop the secondary engine, but there is still too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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Why couldn't Dumbo fly? Because he had just been killed by an African Poacher, and dead elephants can't fly. This is very sad.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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