Q: What did little Jimmy get his grandfather for Christmas? A: Nothing his grandfather died on Thanksgiving

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Man sees a hot girl. The hot girl sees him. The man asks her out on a date. After five years of dating he asks for her hand in marriage. She says "No way, I'm married you horror!!!" The man cries and moves in with his mom... Two days later he commits suicide.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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If I were in a room with you hitler, stalin, i would shoot hitler and stalin because they are horrible people.

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What starts with C and ends with UNT. Ciretrunt

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What did Batman tell Robin before he got into the Batmobile? "Hey Robin, get in the Batmobile."

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Roses are red Violets are black Why is your chest as flat as your back?

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My title of old was Satan. You humans killed my brother, ending God the holy trinity`s stay on earth, the Gods Omega. Moral: And yet you call ME? THE ANTICHRIST?!? I OFFERED HIM WATER! YOU OFFERED HIM TORTURE AND DEATH!

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How many victims of the holocaust does it take to screw in a light bulb? Zero. They're all dead you sick fuck.

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there were three men in a car, Poop, Shut Up, and Manners. They were driving in a truck when poop fell out of the car. Manners went to get him. Shut Up parked somewhere that he wasn't supposed to so the police man came to him. He asked him what his name was and he said "Shut Up" because that was his name. The police man said "Where are your manners?" then Shut Up said,"He went to go scoop up poop".

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Why wasent Toby at school He was hit by a tree

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have to go to the bathroom.

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What's green and smells like a dirty whore? A dirty whore

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Why did the cop pull the black guy over because he was speeding

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Have you see stevie wonders house? No. Neither has he.

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What's worse than The Holocaust? Nothing, The Holocaust was a dark and scary time.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? It's the gas man, I've come to read your meter, like we arranged.

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why did the chicken cross the road ? how else is he going to get to the other side

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Connor is homosexuaI

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2 Men Walk Into A Bar, I Forget The Rest.

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what can jump higher than a tree? anything that can jump because everyone knows that trees cannot jump.

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What's the thing that freaks guys out the most? When you're about to have sex with a girl and it turns out she had a penis and it's bigger than yours

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Why did the kid fall off is bike? He was hit by a bus.

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Why can't black people get sunburned? Natural selection allowed ancient Africans to develop a darker skin shade that would counter strong UV rays.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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