What do you call a girl with no legs? Disabled

Q:What did the frog say to the mailman? A:Nothing theres no mail on Sunday's.

What did the little boy with diabetes get for Christmas? A shot of insulin; just like every other day.

A white man, a black man, and an Arab man are standing in a room. Who stole your wallet? No one, you suffer from ALS and therefore do not carry a wallet because you have no way in which to use it. To top it all off your medical bills are so high that your family would be financially better if you were to die and your dream of being an entrepreneur is slipping away as you realize that pitching an idea is difficult in a monotonous drone.

A man walks into a bar, furious that his son had been knocked down by a car and was now in hospital with a fractured leg and concussion. Another man, who sits on a stool at the end of the bar, is playing with his drink and wondering if his wife had made a chicken curry, since she said she would for tonight's dinner.

What do you call a moving tree? A hurricane killing thousands of people and 3 dogs.

if you have 2 apples and 3 oranges in one hand, and 4 oranges and 1 apple in the other, what do you have? very large hands.

Q: What do you call a basement full of blondes? A: A whine cellar.

That awkward moment where all you want for Christmas is for your parents to get back together but then you realize that they died in a car crash

Josh Brown loved coressing his mums doodle at night.

Why did the frog cross the road? He was stapled to the chicken.

why did the hedge hog cross the road? To get to his 'flat' mate!!

why did the asian wearing a sombrero buy orange juice at 2am? because hes trying to stay sober and do away with alcohol for good because its ruining his family and he wants to be a good father and husband.

whats worse than falling off of your bike? thats as bad as it gets,try to think of something else

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you were observing it, thus changing its quantum state and making it decide to cross.

Why did the old man fall down the stairs? Because he was on his wheelchair.

josh- your a strange boy. liam- yes. due to by up bringing i have been exposed to unusual situations that most people do not encounter therefore affecting how i behave. Secondly the definition of normal is varying from person to person making being normal to every human being difficult to even the most capable of people. Essentialy Josh i care little for you comment. *josh was a black man who died of cancer 6 weeks after this incodent*

Q: If you see a gipsy drowning, what will you throw him?! A: His family.

A deaf man sits down puts on his headphones presses play on his ipod starts to nod his head and realises what he has just done

Why did the parents tell their adopted son to go to bed? He was awake long after he should've been, according to the rules in their household.

A good antijoke? Going to the last few pages of the "Popular" antijoke section....

What did the gay man see when he looked out the window? A UPS truck that was shipping a monkey

What do you get when you combine a potato and an apple? A nice Apple Potato Souffle...

Yo mama is so ugly that she never got married or involved with anyone in her lifetime because everyone was to scared and ashamed to be around her. you're adopted

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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