How do you make a boy cry? Kill his family

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What do you call a cat that growls? A cat

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So a dolphin is dropped off at a park and dies because he was out of the water to long.

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What did the Chinese man do with the sick dog he found in the alleyway? He took it to the vet, nursed it back to health, and later helped the dog get adopted by a nice family down the street.

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Today, I was thirsty so I got in my kitchen and took a bottle of juice out of my refrigirator, I realised the bottle was empty, so I immediatly took a walk to the store and bought another bottle.

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Why do black people like bananas? Because bananas have potassium which therefore gives them bigger muscles, which is why they excel at every sport we white people suck at.

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Charmander is red,Squitle is blue,If you were a pokemon i'd choose you.

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What did the man do when his truck was stolen? He contacted the police, who immediately began searching for the culprit. He then contacted his car insurance company and was soon compensated for the full value of his truck. One day the man was in his new truck listening to the local news and heard that the thief was found and convicted of Grand Theft Auto; his name was Martin Kaiser.

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Why did the child with one arm shave his head? He is a swimmer.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Your doctor, You've been diagnosed with venereal disease.

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What did the blind pole vaulter say to the speed skater? Hi, how are you?

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What is the difference between a black man and a potato? Well, there are a great many differences. But the main one is probably that a potato is a potato, and a black man is a black man.

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roses are red violets are blue i have some cheese im going to eat it

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Knock Knock Who's there? Do you have a minute to talk about our lord and savior Jesus Christ?

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A group of cows boarded a spaceship and was launched into orbit around the Earth. It was the herd shot around the world.

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How did OJ get away with murder? No one really knows. Probably because he an excellent group of lawyers

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Knock knock? Who's There? I AMMM!!! (thumb this down please xD)

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Steve Jobs is alive In our Hearts <3

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Ever hear the joke about the blind guy taking care of the baby ? ... Good, because it's not funny to make fun of blind people and I doubt a blind guy would ever be legally taking care of a baby.

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What did the bullet say to Bin-Laden? Suck it

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Have you seen the newest starwars? What movie? I mean that episode where stars fight... Will Smith vs Keanu Reeves? I am talking about the stars in the sky firing at each other! You know, those star pilots on planes... Flown by Will Smith and Keanu Reeves? BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM! (You heard that one in your head)

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What did the speech impaired man say ? Nothing.

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Get some flipping new jokes people

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What did Stephen Hawking say when his computer crashed? Nothing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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