You know what really pisses me off? When I drink too much coffee.

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What happened to truck full of watermelons careening down the hill? After panicking, the driver was able to gain composure, and shifting the truck into a lower gear, was able to deliver the track safely to the side of the road at the bottom of the ill, where he sat down alongside of the road under the shade of an apple tree, sucking on delicious watermelon.

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a man walks into a bar. ouch. that must suck, but he should really look where he's going

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I scream You scream The police come It's awkward.

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A man walks into his house to see his TV is moving. He notices a black man who starts running when he enters. He then calls the police and gives a description of the man. The robber gets placed under arrest.

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Knock knock! Who's there? ADHD ADHD wh-? SQUIRREL!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know. Chickens are incapable of communicating with humans and thus the intent of the chicken can only be speculated.

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how do you know when an elephant been in your refridgrator The door wont close

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Add William Wright On Facebook Answer- www.facebook.com/public/William-Wright

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im 14, over weight and spotty! you interested? .... im desperate:)

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How many pancakes does it take to build a doghouse? Pancakes are not a feasible material with which to build a doghouse.

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What has two legs and oinks? Half a pig.

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Knock Knock. Whose there? Orange. Orange who? Both your parents are dead John.

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A guy went to McDonalds and asked for a cheeseburger: —Can I have a cheeseburguer? —No

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If life gives you lemons.... Life is an abstract noun not a physical object so it can not give you lemons.

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Q. What did the chicken say to the buffalo? A. Nothing, this is an improbable predicament.

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot

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Why did the goat cross the street? It was running away from the Tsunami

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what is worst than 1 bee stings two bee stings what is worst than two bee stings holocaust what is worse than three bee stings getting raped by a giant scorpion

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What did the mother of the boy with cancer say on his birthday? - Happy Birthday, too bad you still have cancer.

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Q.What do Santa Clause and a grape have in common? A.They both have beards. Except for the grape.

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What is Osama Bin Laden's favourite colour? Doesn't matter. He's dead.

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John Cena for president

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If I fly my canoe upstream and a wheel falls off, then how many lollipops does Obama have? None, because dogs can't use flashlights.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops