What's black, white, and red all over? A painting with black, white and red paint.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What's do you call two bulls, a goat, and a horse? Farm A nimals

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did Susan fall of the swing? She had no arms... Knock Knock... Who's there? Not Susan...

thumb_up thumb_down -14

An Octopus walked into a bar. He then died as he had been out of his natural habitat for an exceedingly long period of time. An octopus can only survive on land for 30 minutes.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

DEATH.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

if you're jesus and you know it, clap your hands

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Your mom is so old that she has a lot of wrinkles because that's what happens to people when they get old.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A dad says to his son "you better stop masturbating or youll go blind'. And the son says "dad im over here".

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Knock Knock. Who's there? I left my car keys inside.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What do you call an Ex-Penn State coach who is anal to young boys? - Strict

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Two peanuts walked into a bar one was as'salted'

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Whats worse than Justin Bieber's love life. My ass crack.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What's worse than having a zit on your face? Getting blue waffle.. google if you don't know what blue waffle is..

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? On average 2,950, however, this has not been properly tested due to obvious reasons.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What the difference between a circle and a triangle? You're an idiot if you don't know the difference.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "I have a gambling problem."

thumb_up thumb_down -14

There are two fish in a tank. They both die, tanks are used for warfare.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What's worse than a burglar breaking into your house in the middle of the night? A rapist breaking into your house in the middle of the night.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why was the man eaten by a tiger? Because tigers are carnivores, but why are they carnivores? Because they eat meat.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why can't you get a bull to talk? Because it felt like beating the shit out of you and mounting you.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

what did the cow say to the chicken Hey im ralston tyler

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Oh you're dating my ex? Do you want my unfinished sandwhich too? And my old shoes? And a couple of my shirts I don't wear anymore? How about a my toys I used to play with? Or my spoiled pickle that's been in my car for about a year and a half after I went to the mall with my friends, we watched a movie, I don't remember which one it was but it was funny, then after that we went to McDonald's and it was the first time I heard of McGangbang and it was pretty good. After that I think we went to Jerry's cousin's house, he was a cool guy until I found out that he likes Tyga, so I ended up never talking to him again.... I went off topic, sorry

thumb_up thumb_down -14

There would not be any me in we, you would have to hijack a media station, you would instantly be branded terrorists, and even if you where not, do you believe that you could have used the media in order to spread individuality, or would you simply have sought to control the masses like the rest? I am not saying that television is wrong, I am saying that as long as there are not enough people willing to think for themselves, and remain loyal to us and themselves, something which we failed at when we where at our greatest peak, then we are all media zombies eventually, and I do not mind, complacency is better than a constant struggle for survival.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops