Two fish are in a tank. One asks the other, "How do you drive this thing?"

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A man, a woman, and a kid are sitting at a table. They are eating dinner, the kid turns to the man and proceeds to explain how he wishes to drop out of school. The man sends him to his room as punishment. The man and the woman resume eating their dinner.

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How many dead babies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Because they're dead, they cant screw in a light bulb. Even if they were alive, it would be highly improbable that a baby could screw in a light bulb.

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What's white, black and can't fly? Nothing important.

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye-patch? Names.

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A guy says a joke. It was not funny

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What is the difference between a black man and a pepperoni pizza? One can actually feed a family of 4.

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Doctor: “Knock Knock” Patient: “Who's there?” Doctor: “The interrupting Doctor” Patient: “The inter- Doctor: You have cancer.

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There was an English man, an Irish man and a Scottish man. The Welsh man couldn't make it. Again.

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Why did the cat eat himself? He was hungry

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What is the difference between a Mexican and a bike? they both get hit by cars in shady neighborhoods, like Copiague, New York

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What's black and crawls around on eight legs? An octopus that just inked itself.

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why did the baby cross the road i tied it to the back of a car

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Whats white? A fridge

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Hey I just met you, and your f$#king crazy,I ate your pizza, so go get me another one!!

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a girl got a friend request from a unknown guy. she chated him asking who he was. he replied vamos a tener sexo caliente y vas a pedir mas rapido mas duro! vamos ser estrellos porno. the girl deleted him as a friend B.A.

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why was the witch in the broom factory? she was recently employed there and is loving her job maing brooms

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What's more traumatising than watching your dad raping a man? Watching a man raping your dad.

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This dog can only sniff marijuana.

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What does Santa and a grape have in common? They're both purple, except Santa.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's DEAD!

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What would happen if you put avocando, pineapple, sardines, peanut butter, brussel sprouts and milk into a blender and drank it. most probabley salmonala poisoning because the sardines were off.

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Why don't I understand myself? Because I am an anti-joke and lack a self-aware existence.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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