A seal walks into a club...and is taken in custody by animal control due to the club having a no animal policy.

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What happened to the kid who couldn't swim? He drowned.

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A boy writes an anti-joke. It is not funny. He sees his friends teasing him about the jokes stupidity. He promptly pokes his eyes out with a dull broom stick. He can still hear his friends mocking him. He cuts his ears off with an industrial meat slicer. He wakes up the next morning and doesnt give a crap about the prior days events. Mainly because he can no longer see or hear.

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Justin Bieber

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im a dragon, no im not

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Why are Germans good at soccer The Holocaust.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was sick and tired of all the repeated monkey jokes and commited suicide and preceded to fall out of the tree.

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What do you call a duck who votes democrat? A duck

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How do chinese people call the firemen? By phone.

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Whats sad about 6 mexicans driving off a cliff in an escalade? An escalade sits 7 people.

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Whats black and has a large penis? A dog with abnormal sized genitalia.

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A man loses his wife in a car accident He then fall into a deep depression then hangs himself.

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? Bees inside of your eyeballs.

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What was the mentally challenged kids first word? He was retarded so it wasn't a word.

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Wanna hear a race joke?.....whoops, ya missed it

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What does the lifeguard do on his free time? Ejaculate.

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You know you are really drunk if your blood alcohol Is higher than .08

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Roses are black, Violets are black, I am blind.

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A blonde rubs a lamp hoping to find a genie that will grant her 3 wishes. It didn't happen.

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How did the Mexican got into USA? Trough the border.

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Why did the woman cross the road? Better yet, why is she out of the kitchen

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Want to hear a joke? No.

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What do you do if you can't go to the Wednesday Night Market on Wednesday? You go on Thursday

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why was the cat black it was a black cat

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops