Q: What did Albert Einstein say to Adolf Hitler? A: They never talked. And if Albert Einstein did say something to Adolf Hitler, he would have died first.

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What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the middle of a lake? Bob

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What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist -Tag

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What's the difference between you and a polar bear? I don't hate the polar bear

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What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing, fruit can't talk.

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Q: what do you call a mushy green circle that tastes good? A: An avocado

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What is a 3 legged dog? It's still a dog! Sheesh

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When life gives you melons, your probably dyslexic.

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What do you call a man with no legs? A cripple

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Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M factory? Because she was a very poor worker.

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Why did the spider cross the road? He was stuck to the bottom of my shoe!

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What does a Somalian want for Christmas? Nothing hes Sunni Muslim and does not celebrate Christmas

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Hi Mum!!!!!!!!

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My friends and family all recommended me for alcoholics anonymous, but all i had to say is that my father didn't raise me to be quitter.

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a black guy hates chicken.

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A man walks into a bar. He has had a tough day at work and unwinds with a beer. He goes home to his loving family. He makes love to his wife that night. It's good but not great.

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What's the difference between Michael Phelps and Adolf Hitler? Michael Phelps can finish a race.

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what did the woman call the man who ate Ham? A Pig

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding an apple.

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What do you call a bunch of hobos having sexual intercourse? A soup kitchen

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Okay, but lets write a contract, if you regret your decision at anytime, you get it all back, minus what I have spent of course, both I and my wife have always wanted to live in a house by the sea, hopefully you nearby. You know, I have never been truly happy because I thought I could change this world, now I know that I tried and failed, maybe I can change myself instead, they say that true change comes from within.

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How do you kill a innocent young boy walking from school? I don't know but do you want to enjoy a refreshing beverage of creaming soda?

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Gretta has five legs? -no

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Knock knock.Who's there?Dead Baby.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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