don't read this

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yes i can connor, this is brett.

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What did the cool guy say to Kelly Clarkson? Nothing, she's fat.

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Why did the Teacher cry? Because he was sad.

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why couldn't the blonde change the lightbulb? she couldn't find the leperchaun at the end of the rainbow

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What do you get when you watch Cinderella backwards? A woman who learns her place.

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Cliterus

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A sloth walked into the dentists he was confused

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Why did the dog lick the boy's leg? Cause when the boy blew up his leg landed in the doghouse

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1: Why did Suzie have no arms and no legs? 2: Why? 1: Knock Knock? 2: Who's there? 1: Not Suzie

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Wanna here a good joke? Sure, but you spelled hear wrong.

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there once was a frog with no leggs

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? So it would not get hit

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someone had sex with Justin bieber end result Justin went into labor

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How did the soup lose his job? He got fired.

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how do you kill a rat skin it and feed it to your child and wait till it shits then when it shits feed it to your dog then when it shits then microwave it and shove the smelly liquid remains up your ass.

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What did the black guy say to you when you took his fried chicken Give me back my chicken

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Why did 'Mister Love' get arrested? Clue: One of the most ironic things ever You can guess

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Yo' momma so fat she buys clothingthat is bigger than most other people's clothing

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This is Nero, the guy striving a bit with the fact that he killed his mother in order to save his wife a month or so before Christmas: cathphra is Exceedingly well read, I say than you. I had a nightmare tonight, my parents where serving tomato soup, while my mother made great food (despite the fact they discovered that it was not angel dust she used, but large quantities of opiate that would have killed an elephant) But this time they served me dry tomato soup (that from packages) and a bowl of lukewarm soup. I asked: How am I supposed to mix this? They both gave me the look of "here comes a beating" I started calling my mother many things that horsehead network sensors, then my father grabbed my neck and tried to twist my head off (and in this dream, rather than in reality, he actually succeeded) but I somehow managed to remain alive. Then I yelled in english: THIS IS BECAUSE I KILLED YOU! I HAVE NO SOUL TO TAKE! Only then I realized it was a dream and woke up...You know, because my parents never spoke English so they would not have understood me... I have a broken vertebrae in my neck to prove that my father tried quite hard to break my neck in reality at least... Yeah, I am mostly over it, I killed my father when he tried to break my neck because I kept scatching my ortopedic arm while studying (real arm which my mother cut off and then proceeded to beat me up with funny story actually) Then killed my mother years later when she stabbed my girlfriend induced under what turned out to be a heavy dose of opiates, and paralgin forte (which main ingredent is... you guessed it MORE opiates).

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A man in an airport asked me if i wanted my bag to be carry-on. So i said yes.

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What did Batman say to Robin after they got on the bus? We should have taken the batmobile.

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Why did the Koala fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second Koala fall out of the tree? He got hit by the first one. Why did the third Koala fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game and wanted to play along.

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What did a policeman say to his belly? Nothing. Because he knows his belly is incapable of speech.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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