How many apple does it take to turn a fridge into a water buffalo? Yellow tactics because of the Minty fragrance

thumb_up thumb_down -2

why can't helen keller drive? Because she is deaf and blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's white and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? A refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the man order a mail order Asian bride? Because he was caucasian which meant females of his race had unrealistically high expectations of a partner due to various materialistic overtones that are constantly portrayed in their medie creating a society of over entitled women who think they are owed the earth.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Ed Rambo. EXPERIENCE as John Rambo is kidnapped by AL QUAIDA (because he did not totally save their ass in the second or third movie riiiight) Leaving Ed Rambo, his son (Played by Eddie Murphy) up to the task of saving him, from Al Quaida`s real leader... Yes, its a conspiracy! "Okay, first Obama is supposedly a terrorist, but seriously the secret alliance between Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton?" Bullshit movie reviews. "So the explanation is that Ed Rambo is black because John Rambo married an Asian woman? What about their age? They are probably the same or something!" Mad Magazine. Moral: Yeah because this annoys you, and you all kinda love me I know its Al Qaeda, but who wants to type that... Now it does not say Skynet is watching anymore... After four times... Wow, god damn we need robocop to be real before the Termitetrisnators travel back in time into our dimension. AND NOT ADAM SANDLERS: ROBOCOP.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Knock Knock. Who's there? Interrupting Pessimist. Interrupting Pessi- Slavery.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

why was 6 afraid of 7? Becuase 7 watched his friend die. He slowly went into a depression so deep he went on a murderous rampage.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Wanna hear a funny joke? Oh, I was just asking.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What 10 inches long and wont be getting sucked this valentines day? Whitney Houstons crack pipe

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Whats the difference between a black man and a pizza? A pizza can feed a family of 5

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the chilean miner say to the other Chilean miner? I wish we could get out of here.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's yellow and can't swim? A tractor.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do you make Barack Obama upset? Stab him.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do you tell if your boyfriend is gay? He is having sex with men

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's the difference between a duck? both of it's legs are the same.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

what did one soldier say to the other... dude take your finger out my a** it has been that long

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Butterfly is standing on a flower. Cow comes and steps on that flower

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the girl run to school Because a lion was chasing her

thumb_up thumb_down -4

whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? a pizza does not have a heart

thumb_up thumb_down -4

The dog, Marley from Marley and Me. It died.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

When Kurt Cobain was little, his mother told him to never play with guns but I guess it went through one ear and out the other.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

you know what rhymes with sloth. rape

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops