how many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? one

Why should people with Alzheimer's not tell jokes? To get to the other side.

I17. I17. I17. That was my best impression of a Bingo caller.

what did the boy with no hands get for christmas Gloves!!! just kidding i dont know he hasnt opened the box yet

Have you heard the one about the monkey who jumped off the roof? Neither have I.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because the monkey was a dead. Don't you dare laugh. Asshole.

If life throws you cars, you are probably on LSD.

Q. What did the mom say to the boy scout? A. He wouldn't be a happy camper.

What did one Stoner say to the other? "I'm hungry, let's order pizza."

How many dead babies will fit in a bathtub? Seventeen

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have altzeimer's, Cheese on toast

Roses are red, violets are blue, sugar is sweet and so are you, but the roses are wilting, the violets are dead, the sugar bowl empty and so is your head.

retard

I'm sn otter

What worse than finding crap on the road? Tripping over and landing on it.

Ask me if I'm a horse. Are you a horse? No.

How many cops does it take to change a lightb- [Beaten to death by cops]

What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

A man is walking in the desert, alone and lost, when suddenly he finds a lamp. The man picks up the lamp and to his surprise, a genie bursts out of the lamp ! The genie says to the man: "Thank you, kind man! You have freed me from this prison I have been in for a million years. I am in your dept and will grant you three wishes." The man replies: "Wow, you've been in there for a million years and all you have to give me are three wishes?" The genie was really sad to hear of the man's lack of appreciation and flew away, leaving the man. The man eventually died of starvation and dehydration.

A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervour father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happyness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

One time at band camp, We practice playing our instruments and had fun.

A dog walk into a bar, and the bartender asks, "What"ll it be?" The dog then breaks into tears as he realizes the bartender is his father's gay husband.

Why did Tupac Shakur get shot? He was a famous and very controversial celebrity, which naturally led to having a lot of enemies.

What did the racist black man say to the white man? Nothing they both died in a car accident.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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