What did the muslim say to the jew. Hello

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How do you get a Hooker Wet? Dump her in a River.

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What did the tourist in Africa get? AIDS

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black And so was six because they were written with black pen

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what do you get when you mix a shit zoo and a pitbull......"bull shit" oh this joke sucks well my life is over

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What's white and looks like paper? Paper

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What do you call a kid with one arm and an eye-patch? Names.

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What 2 differences does a potato have in common? They both have very thin skin.

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A brunette, redhead, and blond were on a road trip. Their car broke down in the middle of the desert. The redhead offered to get help down the road, but never returned. The blond and brunette walked the direction the redhead went, but died four days later of heat exhaustion.

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What's worse than taking a bite in an apple and finding a worm in it? Taking a bite and finding half a worm.

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Why doesn't it rain on Sundays? It does.

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Why did the boy drop his ice-cream? He was shot in the back, knifed in the face, kicked in the groin, poo'd on by an alpaka, had frogs stapled to his face, his hair burnt off, pushed off a cliff, eaten by a scorpian, lost his arms legs and eyeballs, squashed by a hippo, ran over by a buss, truck and cement mixer, had cement poured on his frogs (that were stapled to his face), became morbidly obese, was raped by a chicken, was served as sauce at an italian resturant, was done by his mother's father's grandson, broke both of his detatched legs, crashed his car, went into a time machine and was crushed by a stegosaurous, had a lemon squesed in his detatched eyes, got high on cokeawana, was crushed to death by a garbage disposer and was rejected by the hobo at the shelter? no, actually, he tripped

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What did the fat guy say after his weight-reduction surgery? I'm gonna sue the clown pants out of McDonalds

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A blonde, brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. The redhead, growing tired of the constant ridicule directed at her from the other two, kills them. She pleads guilty to 3rd degree murder on two counts and is sentenced two life sentences in a maximum security prison in Cambodia.

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What did the dancing amphibious landing craft say to the carrot faced caterpillar? wanna get in its cold

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What is the same between a turtle and an eagle? They both fly, apart from the turtle.

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What did jesus REALLY say while walking on water? "I really hope I find a nice patch of sand to swim in."

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Why did the condom drive over his pet mac and cheese? Because his uncle was not george bush.

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Your momma is so old that she might die soon!

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Why did the dyslexic chicken cross the toad? Because the toad mocked his dyslexia, and the chicken does not tolerate rude bastard toads.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw 'em.

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How do you make transportation in Harlem easier? Fix the roads and put in more stoplights.

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What did tarzan say when he saw the elephants? Here come the elephants

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What did Little Jimmie say to his mom when he got home frome school? Nothing his moms dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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