Q.Why did the boy fail to complete his homework? A. He was a loaf of bread

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Knock Knock. Who's there? James. Ok.

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Why did the girl fall She didn't she was eaten by a bear

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Sac

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Whats worse then getting hit by a truck? Getting hit by a turkey!

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Tom: Knock knock! Guy: Who's there? Tom: Carrot. Guy: Impossible.

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One time I masturbated by myself

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What kinds of children go to heaven dead ones

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Why couldn't the colorblind boy play Twister with his friends? He was a quadriplegic.

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A wise man once said a journey of a thousand steps starts with one step. The wise man also smoked weed and starved to death in a cave.

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A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

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punchline below punchline above

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Do you know what's not right? Left.

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why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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What was the blind man doing before he was strangled? He was breathing.

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What the difference between a black person and a piece of shit in a bucket? The bucket

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Who took the cookie from the cookie jar? Your mom

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Johnny tried talking to his dog, there was no response.

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What do u do to blow off steam? I simply go to the top of the empire states building, poor gasoline in a bag, put a baby in it, light it on fire, and through it off the side. problem?

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How many blind men does it take to change a light bulb?

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Waiter, waiter! There is a fly in my soup. Sorry about that sir, we will replace your order and make your meal complementary.

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How many people does it take to kill the president? A number

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Whats worse than being out in the cold? Having cancer.

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What did Annie the Orphan get for Christmas? News that her parents are dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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